Counterbalance
by zero-damage
Summary: Sequel to 'Broken', an AU where Naoto was the villain. Four months on, the fog still hangs low over Inaba. Naoto returns knowing that Souji may be heading down the same dark path as her - while Kanji can only hope to hold one of them back.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: This is the sequel to my Naoto-as-villain story (Broken) and is thus of interest to about four people at best. Still, let's post it anyway. Hadn't been writing long when I wrote the first version in 2009 (and it showed) so I have tried to clean it up where possible. Contains some violence and strong language.  
_

_Brief summary of 'Broken': Adachi was murdered by Kubo in place of Morooka, and Naoto became his replacement in the triumvirate. She joined the team as instructed by Izanami, but began a relationship with Kanji of her own will. In November, Nanako entered the television world at Naoto's hands, and everything unraveled from there - ultimately leaving Naoto in an Okina psychiatric facility, and the team to lick their wounds. This story picks up four months on, in April 2012.  
_

* * *

**1.**

There was an air of disappointment her grandfather never voiced.

His visits to the hospital were brief, squeezed between his casework - about which he no longer shared the details - but he was always kind and patient. Asked how she felt (the same); what she'd been doing (nothing useful); if there was anything Yakushiji could do for her (no). He didn't mention that the Shirogane line might as well end with him - that she had proven unworthy of the name, if in an entirely different way than he believed.

("She was too young," she'd heard him say to Yakujishi from the corridor.)

...She was being dramatic, of course. There was no reason why, given time, she couldn't return to the field. Perhaps she'd be better for it: less selfish, less resentful, less bitter. Less convinced of her own infallibility. Or perhaps (more likely) she was delusional, distracted by guilt, a sense of failure, and the perpetual scratching against the inside of her skull. She wrote letters, or attempted to, trying to untangle the scratches into something sensible, something they would all understand. This was why, this was how. The words were spilled haphazardly over the page, and she crumpled up most of the letters after the first few lines.

In the summer she had honestly believed herself superior to them all, including Seta. Even after joining the team, there had been a brief period where she thought she could actually _do it_, that she could outwit them as she was supposed to; as she'd been _told _to.

But Souji Seta was a hero. She wasn't. She hadn't even been the villain, simply a sideshow. She'd almost killed a child, she'd betrayed the only people to ever treat her as a friend, and more than that, she'd hurt one person she shouldn't - the person she had hated for making her doubt but appreciated (loved)for his unflinching (undeserved) acceptance.

Time was a harsh teacher and Naoto now regretted every moment. She wished that made a difference.

* * *

_**31-03-12**  
_

There were a dozen other things he could focus on. The click of the train against the rails, the shapes in the fog pressing against the window, the way this stupid damn suit scratched against his skin and rode up his calves - anything except where he was going and why. This was only the second time he'd gone somewhere on a train, so he should make sure he enjoyed it. First time had been the trip to Port Island last September. Naoto had come with them.

Kanji grit his teeth to stop thinking and stared out into the fog.

He needed to check the card was still there, they might not let him in without it - so he patted down his pocket again, felt it under his palm, then pulled it out just to be sure. _Koseikai Hospital_ in large printed letters, _Ward B, Room 302 _scribbled underneath in Souji's cramped handwriting, Naoto's full name written below that.

Sweet-talking had never been Kanji's strong point, but Souji was a charmer. Persuaded Naoto's granddad to allow a visit after four full months of refusals. Yukiko had been the first of them to ask, funny enough. Kanji had just sent letters, and had only started asking for visits when nothing came back. Turned down every time.

_Shirogane-san's probably just worried about her,_ Souji had said. _Only family he's got left. _Kanji wasn't convinced the ban on visits had been Shirogane's idea.

He grunted, shifted in his seat - why the hell had he decided to wear a suit? - and leant his head against the window. The fog was getting thinner, so they had to be a good distance from town. Hard to tell with the slow route. But at least the trains were still running, even though nobody was using them much these days. No good reason to come to Inaba unless you were seeing family or working with a TV crew; even those weirdo tourists had finally got too freaked out to visit. He was surprised Souji hadn't done the smart thing and gotten the hell out in March, but Senpai had been acting weird all year.

Dozens of letters and no answer. Kanji was starting to feel like an idiot.

He pulled out the card again, checked it, put it back in his pocket.

Damn, he hoped he wasn't.

* * *

The most difficult part was making himself walk through the hospital doors. Hospitals made him sick; all that fucking white. But once he was inside, finding the room was pretty simple. He showed the card to the lady at the desk and even if she gave him a _look_, one that said he was just some punk in a bad suit, she still told him the way.

Outside the room, he stood in the corridor for a while. Better not to rush it and freak Naoto out. Nothing to do with being too chickenshit to go in.

When he finally worked up the guts to push open the door, he almost knocked over an old guy walking out. Way shorter than him, silver-flecked hair, looked like he'd gotten dressed in the middle of last century. Naoto's granddad, Kanji realized, and thanked whatever spark of thought had made him smarten up for this.

He bowed, sharp and stiff. "T-Tatsumi. Kanji Tatsumi. M'here to see Naoto."

Shirogane gave him a measured look. "Tatsumi. You aren't the boy that called."

"No. That was Souji Seta. But he - he's busy today." It was a lousy lie from an even lousier liar, but Shirogane was decent enough not to point that out.

He glanced at Kanji's hands. "No flowers?"

"Naoto don't like them."

Shirogane smiled, a little sadly. "No, she doesn't."

There was something he was supposed to say here, Kanji thought. Something more than _sorry your grandkid's in the nuthouse_ or _hey do you know why she didn't answer my letters._

"I appreciate your interest in visiting," Shirogane finally said. "Naoto has never made friends easily. I believe she may be leaving the hospital shortly, a few days before I depart for Austria." He studied Kanji for a moment, like he was a new piece of evidence, a vital clue that could crack some case. "I...do not think the estate would be the best place for her, with only my assistant present. Perhaps she could return to Inaba. I understand she has made friends there, you included."

Kanji had always figured Naoto had never told her granddad about him - she'd been raised pretty well and all, and he was nothing special - but something in this old guy's look said he _knew_. Maybe all detectives were like that. Naoto had usually seen through Kanji pretty easily too.

"Yeah, I-I - thass a good idea," he managed.

He wasn't sure if it _was_, really. Naoto had made friends then betrayed them all, him included. Nothing could be the same after that.

Didn't stop him from wanting her back.

Shirogane gave a quick, tight nod. "I will leave you to discuss with Naoto. I would have had you and her other friends visit sooner, had the choice been mine."

Then he turned and walked down the corridor, footsteps echoing in perfect even rhythm. Kanji watched him leave, then straightened his shoulders, tugged down the suit jacket, and entered the room.

Naoto was sitting on the bed inside, legs dangling over the edge. They'd let her wear her own clothes again: white shirt, grey waistcoat, black pants. It looked right - and she looked better. Still pale, still a little too thin, but nothing like she'd been in December, husked out and hollowed.

She looked up. "Kanji-kun?"

"N-Naoto." Four months on, and he could hardly get out her name.

"Grampa mentioned I might have visitors. I-I didn't imagine..." She tilted her head. "Why are you wearing a suit?"

"Uh. Figured, y'know, s'been a while." Kanji rubbed the back of his neck and wished he didn't feel so ridiculous. "Thought I should make an effort."

Naoto smiled at that. A proper one, not like the last - tight and through torn lips, one day after they'd dragged her out the TV for the second time. She stood, walked over to him, and took his hand. "I missed you."

_Just hug her, Tatsumi._

He didn't.

"You too," he mumbled.

Her thumb stroked over his palm just once before she let go. When she perched back on the bed, Kanji noticed a dull grey metal watch chain looped over the edge of her waistcoat pocket. He sat down next to her, not as close as he'd have liked and not as far as he'd have preferred.

"Have you been well?" she asked.

"Y-Yeah. Everything's good."

"And - everyone else?"

"They're good too. Nanako's out the hospital and she's doing pretty well." Same stuff he'd written in his letters. "We did a Christmas party for her, made her a cake and all. Or the girls tried, y'know." He grinned. "I ended up baking another one. They tried to pull the same stunt for my birthday and-" He cut it off there, because Naoto probably didn't want to hear about everything she'd missed while she'd been cooped up in the nuthouse beating herself up.

"I'm glad she's better. And I'm sorry I missed your birthday." Naoto stared down at her hands, clamped white over her knees. "The doctors have told me I am well enough to leave."

Kanji felt his face crack into a grin. "Yeah, your granddad said. S'great."

Her voice sounded taut and forced. "It isn't _sufficient_, I-I have only been here four months and-"

"What, you're gonna sit here and punish yourself?" He shook his head. "Don't play the damn martyr, Naoto."

"I'm _not_," Naoto snapped. "I cannot pretend nothing happened. I should have kept telling the truth to the doctors, but they - I'm so tired of telling the same story, Kanji." She winced. "So...I agreed that I simply imagined it."

"They're never gonna believe you anyway. And you're right in the head now." He snorted. "Probably saner than most people back home. You've heard the stories, right?"

Naoto nodded. "I've been permitted newspapers recently. The fog...it didn't disperse, even after you-" She glanced away. "The adverse effects have continued."

"Right. Senpai's acting weird too. Kinda worried."

"...Weird?" She frowned. "He isn't...like I a-was?"

Kanji pretended not to hear the _am_. "No, no. Just don't look right, always tired. But his mom and dad are coming back late from their trip, so he's staying on in Inaba for a few extra weeks. Means we can all keep an eye on him." Speaking of home, he needed to ask. "So, uh...you gonna come back?"

Naoto raised an eyebrow. "To a town full of mind-altering fog?"

He laughed. "Yeah. You got friends in Inaba, y'know?"

All trace of expression instantly vanished. Naoto's gaze dropped back to the bed. "I doubt that."

Kanji gripped her hand tightly, enclosing it almost completely in his own. "You got me."

* * *

**_01-04-12_**

It hadn't taken much to persuade her in the end. Mostly came down to two things: the fact that the fog was still there and that Senpai wasn't doing good. Kanji wanted to think he had got something to do with it too. Never mind the empty space that'd stretched between them, they'd fix that.

He'd texted Souji soon as he got back and asked to meet him at Souzai Daigaku the next day. Neither of them really wanted to eat but they ordered anyway; the shop was struggling with everyone hiding out at home.

"Naoto's coming back," Kanji said, casually as he could.

Souji folded his arms, and kept staring at the steak croquets he hadn't even touched.

"She's worried about you. I told her you'd been...having trouble, y'know." He paused. "You guys talked when she first went in the hospital, right? Did you..." _Did you get anything out of her because I still don't understand and I don't know what questions to ask. _Senpai's business, though. Not his.

Souji shook his head. "I don't know. What she said...it didn't make much sense. Some of it's clearer now."

"You gonna talk to her when she gets here?"

"Of course." He met Kanji's eyes, dark circles under his own. "But if you mean, have I forgiven her, I can't answer. Haven't fully forgiven Namatame."

"Wasn't what I was asking." Too soon, Kanji knew that much. "Just want to know if she's got a place here."

"If she doesn't, it's her own fault."

"Yeah. She knows that."

"Then I'll do my best. I think the girls will too. Just try to keep her away from Yosuke." Souji sighed. "He's a good guy underneath, Kanji, but he's got every right to be angry and he can't let go of a grudge."

Kanji nodded, then leant forward over the table. "Listen - all that stuff she said, last year. You believe her?"

Head tilted back, Souji stared up at the fog. "Before? Not completely. Now...I'm not sure."

* * *

Kanji didn't tell anyone except Souji, which might not have been the smartest thing he'd ever done. It'd be hard no matter which way they handled it, though, and Souji just didn't look up to dealing with the fallout twice over. Rise usually knew what was up and she was terrible at keeping anything quiet, so Kanji already knew Senpai had been dreaming the same sort of stuff Naoto'd talked about. Considering that scared _Kanji_ shitless, he couldn't imagine how Souji felt.

Inaba was getting worse too - nothing drastic, just a slow slide day by day, to the point where it almost seemed normal that there were people cowering in the Junes foyer and sleeping rough in the streets. Just like it seemed normal that TV crews had been hanging around for months, even more of them than when Mayumi Yamano died, all asking the same questions and filming the same damn fog.

The team had gotten together a couple of times back in February, tried going inside the television to see if they could figure out why the fog hadn't left. Rise and Teddie had never picked up anything new. The old worlds had all still been there, save for Naoto's, but nothing else.

Kanji shook his head and pushed open the shop door. Ma was behind the counter inside, checking through order forms. He'd been planning what he'd say in his head for the last half-hour, at least when he hadn't been busy convincing himself Ma would say no. But she knew Naoto, and - much as he'd have preferred otherwise - she knew there'd been something between them. This shouldn't be that difficult.

She looked up from the paperwork. "Kanji-chan? Is something wrong, dear?"

"Nah, s'good." He ambled into the shop, hands shoved in his pockets. "You, uh, you remember Naoto, right?"

Ma smiled gently. "Of course! Lovely girl, such a shame what happened. Must have been very hard though, being a detective on a murder case at such a young age, and-"

"Yeah. It was. Listen, she's coming back to Inaba this weekend. Is - is it okay if she comes to stay here?"

Ma paused.

"Look, there ain't no other way, yeah?" Kanji snapped, louder than he'd intended. "Otherwise she's gotta stay in her place by herself and that ain't right, not when she's just got out the hospital."

"Well, we can't have that." She nodded. "Very well, she's welcome to stay. Provided you don't get up to anything under my roof, hmm?"

There was a slight smirk at the end that Kanji could already feel pushing heat to his face, but he couldn't help but smile. "Thanks, Ma."

* * *

**_07-04-12_**

The steady click of the train would have been comforting, if it weren't almost exactly one year since she'd first done this and if it weren't her first time outside in four months. The rain hadn't stopped pouring since the afternoon; another echo, this one of the day she was first taken to Koseikai.

Kanji was asleep beside her, propped against the window, so she opened her bag as quietly as possible before pulling out a sheaf of papers. Though the hospital staff had strongly discouraged it, she'd kept up to date with the situation in Inaba and had taken copious notes from the newspaper reports. Untrustworthy as the printed media might be, they'd been her only source of information.

Namatame had not been charged. There was nothing more than circumstantial evidence to suggest he abducted Nanako, of course, and even though he'd claimed to have kidnapped the team members the police had considered him as unreliable as they did her. Four months later, the fog continued to hang low over Inaba and its effects on the populace had not abated. No wonder the media still took such an interest.

However, it was Souji that concerned her most. He was strong (stronger than she'd ever be) but the little Kanji had told her sounded crushingly familiar, and Naoto knew better than most the way everything slowly and imperceptibly unraveled. The knowledge left her with the terrible sense of history repeating. Her own dreams still occurred. Less frequently, perhaps due to her distance from the fog, but the intensity remained the same despite the doctors' attempts to medicate her.

Naoto had no intention of telling Kanji this. Not only had he offered her a place to stay - insisted, no matter how many times she'd politely refused - but he'd also been kind enough to collect her from the hospital. Again, she'd insisted she was capable of returning alone, knowing the lie even as she'd spoken it. Kanji had known it too, being familiar with her overdeveloped sense of pride. He'd even helped her pack. Naoto wondered if he'd noticed the unopened envelopes piled underneath the clothes in her suitcase. He would have recognized his own handwriting.

If Souji needed help, she had no choice but to return. Debts needed to be repaid. Naoto just couldn't imagine what purpose she might serve.

_You're still a detective_, Kanji had told her.

The words on the pages blurred. Her scribbled theories were circular, nonsensical, like the letters she'd written and never sent. The only exception had been the letter Naoto had written every night; unchanging in content and always to the same person.

She glanced at Kanji - eyes closed, mouth slightly open, one hand cradling his head against the rain-streaked window - and swallowed hard.


	2. Chapter 2

**2.**

**_07-04-12_**

"Thank you again, Tatsumi-san." Naoto bowed, cap in hand. "I am truly grateful for your hospitality."

_Still got class,_ Kanji thought.

Ma smiled back, warm and gentle. "There's no need to be so formal, Naoto-kun. I'm glad to see you looking so well again."

It was a polite lie; Naoto hadn't looked right since last summer. Kanji remembered the boy he'd met last spring: strong, cold, untouchable. But Ma meant well. She'd even been cool with them showing up an hour late and dripping rainwater all over the shop floor.

"Kanji-chan, why don't you show Naoto-kun to her room?" Ma said, gesturing to Naoto's suitcase and travel bag. "And make sure you carry those for her."

Naoto stiffened at that, and Kanji was pretty certain he wouldn't be carrying both. "No problem," he said.

After they'd both shrugged off and hung up their damp coats, they climbed the stairs together. Kanji managed to grab the suitcase, at least, and he carried it to the spare room at the back of the building. Ma always kept it clean, ready for the frequent occasions when either her younger sister or her niece visited from Tokyo - occasions Kanji typically made sure to spend somewhere else.

The room was cramped and bare except for a wooden chair, a non-matching table, and the bed flush against the wall. One brief trip to Australia had convinced Aunt Reiko she liked them better than futons. Ma hadn't been able to resist picking bright blankets: blue and white checked squares, with a light yellow throw over the top.

Naoto placed the travel bag on the table and perched carefully on the bed.

Kanji had stayed focused on a single goal: getting her out of the hospital and back to Inaba. He hadn't considered what would come afterward. Though he never would've admitted it out loud - especially not to Naoto - he'd been half-convinced she wouldn't come back at all.

"There, uh, anything you wanna do?" he asked, still clutching the suitcase.

"My grandfather has continued to pay the rent on my apartment. There are a few items there I should collect." She shrugged. "But that can wait."

"Okay. No problem." Kanji eyed her carefully." You're gonna come back to school, right?"

Naoto stared at the floor.

"It don't have to be straight away," he said, then tipped his head and grinned. "But even detectives gotta graduate, right?"

Her mouth curved in a hint of a smile, barely visible under her cap. "Yes. They do."

"Good. So thass that." He remembered the suitcase in his hand, now, and placed it on the floor by the desk. "Uh, Souji-senpai wanted to know when you got here. Think he wants to talk."

"I'm sure he does. Please contact him while I unpack."

Kanji nodded, then walked out of the room and flipped open his phone.

* * *

One hour later, Souji showed up looking half-dead: eyes red-rimmed and set in dark circles, skin a ghostly pallor. "Just slept badly last night," he insisted. "Nothing to worry about."

Kanji thought of the way Naoto had looked last year - still did now, to an extent - and said nothing, because Souji was _different_. Souji knew something was up. The rest of the team did too, after he'd apologized to everyone for being so terse lately and not always paying attention.

Of course, they also knew he wasn't telling the full story.

"Well, look after yourself, Senpai," Kanji said, and tried for as casual a shrug as he could manage.

"I will. Sorry for imposing on you, but it's best we meet here. My uncle's at home tonight."

Kanji nodded, then led him into the living room. Inside, Naoto was sat cross-legged on the floor, stiff and still as stone. When Souji nodded briskly at her, she didn't move save for a slight tip of her head in his direction. Both of them stayed expressionless.

_Statues_, Kanji thought.

"You can sit down, yeah?" he said. "I'll get drinks." He had to do _something_. He wasn't made for this, all steely glances and a bunch of stuff that was being said yet wasn't. "Tea okay?"

Neither of them answered, so he ushered Souji towards the sofa then headed to the kitchen. He'd just boil some water first. Let them get finished staring at each other. A few moments later, as he was leaning against the counter, he finally heard Souji speak.

"So, how have you been?"

"I think you know the answer, Senpai."

They both fell quiet. Kanji stared at the stove until Souji broke the silence a second time. "I'll be honest. I never believed Adachi killed Konishi and Yamano."

"You suspected me?" Naoto asked, voice stretched taut and far too flat.

"No. My uncle checked your records for me, so I know you were finishing a case in Sendai last spring. I just didn't believe it was Adachi." A brief pause. "But now, I think you might've been right."

"Why? What evidence do you have?"

Typical. Souji had said outright that he was ready to believe her and Naoto wanted him to explain why. As he filled the pot with water, Kanji shook his head.

"Back in January, Yukiko remembered that Adachi was at the inn on the night Yamano disappeared," Souji said. "And I - borrowed a few pages of the case report. Adachi also interviewed Saki Konishi. Three times."

"…I don't remember hearing about that, but it's certainly unusual that one witness would be called back so many times."

"Yeah. But Naoto, even if Adachi was guilty, you still-" Souji stopped short and let out a long breath. "You were responsible for Kubo. And Nanako."

His tone wasn't bitter or angry, just tired, and Naoto didn't respond.

After what felt like hours of silence, Kanji finally broke. Forget the tea. He loped back into the living room and flopped deliberately down onto the sofa, heavy and clumsy as he could, just to cut the tension - because the air was so thick with it he could hardly breathe.

It worked. Both Souji and Naoto both glanced over in surprise, though the latter still looked coiled tight like a spring. _She already said she was sorry,_ Kanji almost told Souji, but Naoto cut in first.

"I'm sorry," she said. "For everything. I realize that makes little difference."

Souji's eyes narrowed sharply. "It's not me you should apologize to."

"I _know_." Her hands were pressed tight against her thighs, fingers white and bloodless.

He exhaled slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Listen, I spoke to Namatame after you left. He wasn't very coherent, but there were similarities between your stories."

"Course there were," Kanji blurted, and he _knew_ it was stupid even as he said it, when he'd barely figured out what Naoto's story had been - but if it was similar to Namatame's, that meant none of what had happened was how everyone had thought. None of it.

He shot a glance at Naoto, but she was staring at the floor.

Souji turned to look at him. His expression was composed, but his eyes said something else entirely. "Kanji, I need to talk to Naoto alone."

Naoto snapped up her head, looking bewildered - but it leveled out in an instant.

Kanji had never been the calm one of the group. "What? Why d'you need-"

"It's all right, Kanji-kun," she said, firm and steady. "I will be fine."

"But-"

"I will be fine," she repeated, quietly.

And Kanji thought, yeah, this was how it was, how he'd seen it going last year. Always Souji and Naoto, for whatever reason - strategies, weird dreams, having twice the fucking brains he'd ever have - and now big dumb Kanji-kun was getting shoved out. But jealousy was stupid, right? It wasn't like Naoto was _tired_ of him, even if they hadn't talked properly since she'd come back and the only reason she'd done so was for Souji.

Not like that at all.

"Whatever," he muttered, and stalked up the stairs.

Flopped on his bed and facing the wall, he could still hear the murmur of their voices below but none of the words were clear enough to make out. Twenty minutes or so later, Naoto came upstairs. She was light-footed, but he still heard her moving down the hallway - the store was old, the floorboards always creaked - and when she paused outside his door, he pretended to be asleep.

* * *

**_08-04-12_**

Neither of them wanted to go to Junes. Too many people there who might recognize the Detective Prince and too many kids from school, not to mention Yosuke and Teddie. But after being cooped up for months, Naoto needed to get used to going outside again - so Kanji told her he wanted to go to the bookshop instead. The look she gave him said she knew it was for her benefit. Other than manga, reading had never been high on his list of priorities. Souji probably read all the time.

They headed out in the morning, before the district got busy - or as busy as it ever was these days with the fog still keeping most people inside. Without his glasses, Kanji wouldn't have been able to see more than a meter ahead - which might've been the better option. _With_ his glasses, he could see the two girls cowering on the pavement opposite Aiya, the guy curled on his side and whimpering next to the general store, and the man leaning headfirst against the bulletin board with his fists pressed tight against his temples.

"Much worse than before," Naoto whispered at his side, still adjusting her own glasses. They'd gotten a little beat-up back in December. Rise had picked them up inside the television, then given them to Kanji a day later - biting her lip, eyes brimming with tears - because she hadn't known what else to do with them.

He nodded grimly. The air was chilly, so he shoved his hands deeper inside his jacket pockets.

Inaba had been swathed in dense fog for over four months. The media still mostly put it down to freak weather conditions - it was far too cold for April, after all - and had hired a bunch of quack-scientists to spout crap on the television news. One of the national newspapers had even claimed the town was haunted, which was still stupid, if a little closer to the truth. The stories had attracted tourists for a while; they'd probably been the Amagi Inn's only customers this year, until even they'd got too freaked out to stay.

Naoto kept glancing around as they walked, eyes darting from building to building, and didn't stop even when they reached the bookstore. "Are you sure there's-"

"Kanji-kun!"

Shit.

Kanji had heard Rise's voice enough times inside his head and out to know it anywhere. Beside him, Naoto froze.

"Kanji-kun, wait up! Who-" Rise's voice cut off there. He could see her through the fog behind them, about ten meters away, her eyes wide and fixed firmly on Naoto.

Naoto tugged down the brim of her cap, disguising it with a halfhearted nod. "Rise-san."

"N-Naoto-kun." Rise walked toward them, but her steps were almost uncertain - something that Rise _never_ was - and her gaze stayed on Naoto all the way. "It - It's good to see you."

"I'm - glad to be back," Naoto said quietly.

Kanji cleared his throat. "We're just goin' for a walk, s'all. Since Naoto ain't been here in a while."

"Yeah, you were in-" Rise began - then stopped and forced a Risette-brand, crowd-pleasing smile. It didn't really work, but he appreciated the effort. "But you're back!"

"Yes."

A tense silence settled over them, one so awkward he thought he might choke on it. Either that or smack Naoto's and Rise's heads together - but they'd be replaying this scene over and over, dammit, and he couldn't do that with _everyone_ on the team.

"I-I'll be inside," Naoto eventually muttered, and opened the door to the bookshop.

Soon as she'd disappeared inside, Rise turned back to Kanji - who suddenly wished that certain girls, namely Rise Kujikawa, didn't have a knack for making him feel ten centimeters tall. "So, Kanji-kun. Why didn't you tell me?"

He shrugged, frowning intently at the shop window. "Figured it wouldn't be a good idea. Get everyone riled up."

"Well, _duh_. Of course it will! But they're gonna see her eventually, so you can't just pretend nothing happened." In the window's reflection, he watched Rise put her hands on her hips and level him with a glare. "I bet Naoto-kun isn't, right?"

Books in the window. Lots of them. Naoto liked that sort of thing.

Fuck it, reading a newspaper was dull enough for him.

"Kanji-kun, don't ignore me!" Rise's hand whacked against his shoulder, though he barely felt it through his leather jacket.

He turned to face her. "How d'you think they'll take it? The others?"

Rise shrugged. "Kanzeon doesn't make me psychic, y'know. But...probably badly."

"What about you?"

"I-I dunno." She shook her head. "I always thought Naoto-kun was-we used to talk sometimes, you know, as much as she ever talked with anyone. Well, except you. And I thought in November that things were really changing, we were gonna be friends, but then it turned out she was lying." Rise hesitated, stare fixed on a point somewhere past Kanji's left elbow, her arms wrapped tight around her. "So - yeah."

Unable to untangle that answer, Kanji opted for the direct approach. "D'you hate her?"

"No. Maybe a little. What she did was _horrible_, Kanji-kun," Rise said, nearly wincing as she did. "But I feel kinda sorry for her."

It was a better answer than he'd expected, and probably the best he could hope for. "Okay. Long as you don't think she-" He frowned again, this time at his feet. Inside his pockets, his hands instinctively curled into fists. "She ain't a bad person. I know she ain't."

Rise hummed in what he hoped was agreement. Several long moments passed before she finally spoke. "Don't worry, I'll tell the others."

He looked up. "What? Tell 'em Naoto's back? Rise, wait a-"

"Trust me! They're gonna find out anyway, you know how quickly rumors travel here." She winked at him. "I'll tell them you told me to tell them."

Kanji worked that one through in his head for a second or two. "Oh. Gotcha." Then he sighed. "You probably couldn't keep it a secret anyway, right?"

"Nope," Rise said, and smirked.

Asking Rise to stay quiet about anything was about as effective as asking her to back-flip to Jupiter. But maybe her telling the others was for the best. At least Kanji might not have to knock too many heads together.

* * *

**_11-04-12_**

He _really_ didn't want to be here. Good thing Naoto had stayed home. Kanji peered around a shelf in the Junes grocery department - gaze flickering over the not-so-fresh fish counter, the racks of junk food, the lady serving up small samples of cake - and hoped desperately that today was Yosuke's day off. If he was lucky, he could grab the stuff Ma wanted and get to the checkout without anyone noticing he was-

"Hey, Kanji-chan!"

Screw bleaching his hair. He could get Ted to turn it white and save himself the money. "Shit!" Kanji hissed, jerking away from the boy behind him. "Don't creep up on me like that, idiot!"

"_You're_ the one creeping, and it looks bear-y strange." Ted tipped his head. "Are you hiding from someone?"

_Partly you_, Kanji almost said, but settled on a lie by omission. "Yeah. Hanamura. He workin' today?"

"Yep, he's helping in the stockroom. But why're you hiding from him?" Teddie asked, then paused, fiddling with the straps on his orange Junes apron. "Is it because Nao-chan came back?"

Rise hadn't wasted much time. Kanji had spent his first week back at school avoiding the senpai, figuring she'd already told them - but he'd forgotten about Ted. Shame he couldn't do the same with Hanamura. "Yeah. He's gonna be pissed."

Ted didn't say anything, not at first. He stared at his feet instead - or rather, the eye-achingly pink trainers he'd picked out from the girls' clothing department upstairs. The longer the silence stretched out, the more awkward it got, until finally, he lifted his head.

"He's already mad. He said so. Nao-chan did - a lot of bad things," Ted said, quietly. Then he immediately shot an arm into the air, index finger raised. "But don't worry, Kanji-chan! Teddie won't spill any of your beans on Yosuke."

Kanji decided to let that one slide - who knew when Hanamura would walk back out here? - and tapped his knuckles against Teddie's arm instead. "Thanks, Ted. I gotta get going, my ma wants a bunch of stuff."

Teddie nodded. "Tell Nao-chan to come to Junes, okay?" He smiled, broad and uncomplicated. "Then I can say hello."

* * *

**_18-04-12_**

It took a lot of convincing on Kanji's part - more than it'd taken getting her back to Inaba in the first place - but Naoto returned to school the following week. He'd felt bad for pushing her, knowing she dreaded running into the rest of the team and that she was still always so tired. Kanji swore he'd heard her talking some nights, long after she'd gone to bed. Maybe she'd been phoning her grandad. Maybe it was just a habit. He didn't want to ask.

In the end, it was way better for her to be back at Yasogami - because even if school was a major pain in the ass, it gave her something to do. Something other than hiding in Kanji's room, poring over newspaper clippings and those dusty books she'd picked up at the shop with titles he barely understood; filled up with myths, old gods, ancient history.

It wasn't healthy. When he'd been badgering Naoto into going back to school, he hadn't brought it up.

Her first day went about as well - or badly - as they'd both expected. Gossip spread like wildfire in small town, and Inaba was no exception. Most students had heard back in December that the Detective Prince had cracked up under pressure. To Kanji, that'd seemed far better than knowing the truth - until the first bout of whispers and glances in the corridor, and the look he caught in Naoto's eyes straight after.

Things didn't go much better with the rest of the team. Rise's best efforts proved stilted and awkward, Chie smiled when she passed Naoto in the corridor but otherwise stayed well away, and Yosuke blanked her completely. Souji was too distracted to pay attention to anyone; Naoto probably could've summoned Izanagi in the middle of the library without him batting an eyelid.

The only one who really made things work was Yukiko. She spent time chatting to Naoto, unrewarding as that had to be, and even offered to help her catch up with any work she'd missed.

She'd asked to visit Naoto, too. Even before Kanji had.

"Why're you being so nice?" he blurted out, when he found her pinning club flyers and class schedules to the notice-board during lunch. It was kind of a rude question. He'd known Yukiko since they were little kids. She'd _always_ been nice.

Yukiko looked confused. "Why shouldn't I be?"

"You know, right? The others." He shifted his weight, one leg to the other. "They're still hurting."

"Well..." She turned to face him, papers still clutched in her hands. "I guess I feel bad for Naoto-kun."

"Why?"

Yukiko took a breath. "I remember how I felt before confronting my Shadow, Kanji-kun. Before you joined. It - wasn't easy."

"Yeah. Something 'bout you and Chie-senpai." Her eyes widened at that and he quickly added, "Hanamura said so."

"Did he, now." It was said in a way that made Kanji once again grateful that he wasn't Yosuke Hanamura, but she followed it with a quiet sigh. "It wasn't just Chie. It was _everything_. I hated the inn, I resented my family. I wanted to escape."

Even back when they were kids, Kanji had always figured Yukiko had it made. A future laid out in neat lines, just like him; a place where she'd always fit. "Seriously? But why?"

"I just wanted...some uncertainty, I suppose. And Chie was the only friend I had. The one random element. My _prince_." Her grip tightened, fingers pressing creases into the flyers. "I'm - not that good with other people, Kanji-kun."

Like _that_ was unusual. Kanji shrugged. "You an' me both. Naoto too."

"_Exactly_. I-I wouldn't have made it without Chie - even if that caused us both problems." Yukiko turned back to the board and pinned up another flyer. "Until she met us, Naoto-kun had no-one."

Kanji frowned. "She's got me," he said, and tried not to think about whether Naoto actually cared.

"But she didn't before. It's not an excuse," Yukiko told him quietly, "but if you don't have anyone to count on, you don't stand a chance."

* * *

**_20-04-12_**

"Man, you're not even _trying._"

Naoto glared at the floor, arms crossed, eyes barely visible under her cap. The last bell for the day had just rung and Classroom 2-1 was empty. "I don't expect them to accept me."

Kanji didn't fully blame Naoto for her pessimism. The pattern of her first day back had repeated for her second, then her third. All the regular people whispering and gawking, and half the team determined to do the opposite.

But she wasn't doing herself any favours, either. She'd been cold toward Rise and not much better with Yukiko. Chie had finally broken during lunch and asked how she was doing, how did it feel to be a second-year now, inoffensive stuff. Naoto had barely said two words. "I know," Kanji said. "But you're making it worse. Tryin' to piss them off even more."

"How would _you_," Naoto said, voice clear and precise, "know what I am trying to do?"

_Because it's fucking obvious_, Kanji didn't say. Instead he scowled and muttered, "Quit feeling sorry for yourself."

"I'm not. But it's patently obvious that everyone else pities me, including you."

And it was that _tone, _that stupid, patronizing way she had of saying it, which tipped him over the edge. "The hell'd I ever say that? S'all in your head!"

Her muscles visibly tightened: jaw, arms, shoulders. "I-I don't need to be protected, Kanji," she said, though her voice was hoarse. "Stop treating me like a child."

"Then stop actin' like one!" he snapped. "Maybe they _should_ pity you - unless you're happy with the shit you pulled last year?"

"Guys, stop for a minute."

Rise's voice, quiet and shaky. Kanji didn't remember seeing her come in - but, shit, it didn't matter what she saw, not when Naoto was being such a damn idiot.

Naoto glared at him - leaning forward on tiptoes, eyes narrowed almost to slits. "Don't you _dare_ suggest that!"

"C'mon guys! Please, it's-"

"Why the hell not? Not like you listen to me on anything else, not when you're-"

"Both of you, _shut up_!"

Kanji looked up. At the edge of his vision, Naoto did the same. Rise was glaring at them both, fists clenched, but there was an edge of desperation in it that had swallowed all the anger.

"Listen, Souji-senpai just passed out by the school gates. I-I don't know what's up," she said, voice cracking at the end. "Chie-senpai said he woke up really quickly, but Kondo-sensei's taking him to the hospital anyway."

Dammit_._ No matter how quick Souji had woken, and even if it wasn't much of a surprise given how he'd looked lately, this wasn't good news. Kanji shook his head. "Hell, I knew Senpai didn't look right, but this…"

"Is anyone else accompanying him?" Naoto's voice was calm, level - and, right now, really pissing Kanji off.

"Yukiko-senpai, I think. Not sure about the others. Kondo-sensei said he didn't want to ferry half a soccer team to the hospital." Rise was twirling strands of hair tight around her fingers, a nervous habit she'd never been able to shake. "But it's okay. I mean, Souji-senpai's gonna be fine, isn't he?"

Kanji forced a smile. "Yeah. Probably just tired. You know how he's been lately." He glanced sideways. "Right, Naoto?"

Naoto said nothing.


	3. Chapter 3

**3.**

**_20-04-12_**

They all went to the hospital, of course. Kanji, Naoto, Rise and Chie caught the bus together, while Yosuke rode on his bike - Teddie and him balancing precariously on one saddle. Turned out to be a waste of time, pretty much. The doctors wouldn't let anyone in but family. But Kanji had felt like he needed to do it anyway, that he owed more to Souji than he could ever pay back. After about half an hour, Chie left to take Ted to Junes, Yukiko and Yosuke had both made it clear they were staying and Dojima was on his way - so Kanji, Rise and Naoto made a quick exit and headed back to the shopping district.

It was an awkward trip. The silence lasted from the moment they walked out the hospital lobby and right up until they were on the bus together, already halfway home - when Rise finally broke it.

"I remember when Nanako-chan was in the hospital last year," she said. "Souji-senpai was a total wreck. He wasn't sleeping, he skipped meals, and all he ever wanted to do was go visit her." She kept her gaze fixed on the bus window, though there was nothing outside to see but fog. "And even then, nothing like this happened."

There was a long pause before Naoto spoke. "There is more to Seta-senpai's condition than you can understand."

_Then fricking tell us, _Kanji wanted to say, but Rise got there first.

"Naoto-kun, if you know something - you've gotta explain it to us, okay?" She'd turned to face Naoto now, expression just short of a glare. "You owe it to Senpai."

The coldness in Naoto's voice ran bone-deep. "My debts to Souji-senpai are not your concern."

"No, they aren't," Rise agreed. "But _he_ is."

If Naoto's tone had been cold, the silence now was freezing. And Kanji was stuck between them both: Rise sitting to his left, Naoto on the other side of the aisle to his right. He stared firmly at the back of the seat in front and kept his gaze there until the bus reached the shopping district. Rise dashed off as soon as she got outside, with a mumbled excuse about needing to help her grandmother in the shop.

Kanji watched her leave, then looked down at Naoto. "She's right. Don't keep it all t'yourself."

"Why shouldn't I," Naoto muttered, without making it sound like a question.

"Because you did that last time," he told her, ignoring her sudden glare. _And look where it got you_.

* * *

**_21-04-12_**

Later that night, Yukiko texted the whole group. _Souji's okay. The doctors ran a few tests. They suggested keeping him overnight but he refused. We're on our way back now._

Had to be more than 'a few tests'. It was already gone midnight, and at least eight hours had passed since Kondo-sensei had taken Souji to the hospital. But maybe the place had just been busy.

Kanji rolled onto his back, arms spread high over his pillow, and wished he was smarter, that he knew how to do more than sew and cook and hit stuff - because then he could figure out what was up with Souji and fix it. He could fix things with Naoto too. Or fix her. Whichever it took.

Why the hell had she cared about him to begin with? Never given a damn about anyone else, so why start with him, when all it'd done was hurt them both? Now she was breaking things with everyone, because she was Naoto and for the smartest person Kanji had ever met, she was a damn idiot.

And maybe that was what it came down to, what had caused all this. She'd been stupid and stubborn enough to think she could do everything by herself, and even when she'd stumbled in way over her head she'd never told one of them, not even him. If she had, she would never have done all that stuff. No way. They'd have worked things out.

But she hadn't. She'd lied to them all instead. Tried to _kill_ them, even if she'd wanted to be stopped, and-

The thought was cut off by a sudden, strangled noise from somewhere nearby.

He couldn't place it at first, wasn't even sure he'd heard it. He listened again, but all he could hear were people walking outside and a few street cats yowling, so he rolled over onto his stomach and rested his head on his arms. Should get some damn sleep or he'd end up like Souji, keeling over in schoolyards.

Then there was another sound, one he _knew_ he was hearing - a sharp cry and a thud, down the corridor from his room.

Kanji bolted upright. He was up and out the door before he had time to think.

* * *

Find the connection_, Souji told her._

_Him, her, Namatame, perhaps Adachi. All able to enter the television. There are connections, Naoto thinks, networks of lines and sharp angles, this explains this explains this. She simply can't see them when the world entire is blurring into the fog. Souji can be of no use now, because everything's happening all over again and he's heading down the same path, his footsteps perfectly overlapping hers even though he must see and feel the consequences rushing toward him every night._

I've been having these dreams_, he told her._

_Perhaps she imagined it all and still does, if less frequently. Perhaps he does too. A collective delusion. Mere tricks of the mind - because there's no rational explanation for why Tohru Adachi stands in front of her when she saw him hanging dead from a water tower last July._

Fucking terrible replacement_, he tells her, with the sort of snide, patronizing smile Naoto is dangerously close to associating with all police detectives. _You screwed it up, Shirogane.

_Naoto's first impulse, the pang of injured pride and the burning desire to prove him wrong, may just prove her theory: that she _did_ imagine it all and that the choices were purely hers, start to finish._

_Adachi laughs, a terrible high-pitched sound, blood spraying from his lips and running down from just above his left ear. _Finally figured it out, huh?

_The best case scenario, because a good detective explores as many as possible, is that she was only partly responsible, that Souji is correct and their experiences overlap - that some external force sought out her strings and tugged at them. Except that's hardly the best case at all, because it implies a loss of control - that she was utterly trivial to manipulate and that years of discipline and restraint proved worthless._

Pride is a sin, isn't it?

_Souji now, not Adachi, but the blood remains, trickling slowly from the corners of his mouth and dripping onto his shirt. He holds a sword in his hands._

Avarice too, Naoto. Envy, arrogance, deception.

_Her feet refuse to move - the left on a red square, the right on black - and there's something else behind Souji now, something that isn't Izanagi, something white and silver. A face blurred in the fog, and it's horribly, terrifyingly, beautifully familiar._

I will use you again_, Souji says, in a voice that isn't his. _I will use you and break you, and you will do as I command.

_Last summer, sun beating overhead and the smell of melting tarmac underfoot. Looking up at the water-tower, unable to care that Adachi was dead. Dreaming two nights later. Realizing one night - because she'd seen it happen in her dreams, watched Yamano and Konishi as they were shoved inside - that she could do it too. Then, five minutes later, watching her hand slip through the rippling screen._

_Realizing that this was what she was _supposed_ to do all along. All her problems solved._

_Souji grins but the twist in his mouth is wrong, as if his lips are hooked and pulled. _I will use you both. And he will be the key.

_Naoto can't stand him or that mimicry of a smile (he's everything she could have been, would have been, if she'd only been born as she _should_) and she wants to scream - but instead she clenches her jaw tight as Souji lifts his sword._

_He has _always_ been better than her._

_Naoto thinks, _I can't win this.

_He runs towards her, two hands holding the blade at his side, tip spiking forward like a spear._

_But the only reason she lost before was-_

_The world spins, tilts at angles. Disorientated, she screws her eyes shut and feels the impact as Souji slams into her - the cold metal stab clean through her chest, the burst of pain shriek up her spine, the scream catch inside her lungs - except there's a sudden weight in her hands and the smooth wrappings of a hilt against her palms._

_She opens her eyes. She's pressed against someone much taller and she's now holding the sword, buried to the hilt in their stomach._

_Kanji looks down at the blade then down at her. His eyes are cold and so are his hands wrapped over hers and all Naoto can think is _no no this isn't it this is worse _before the cry she's been holding finally leaves her throat._

* * *

Holding her still should've been simple - she was tiny, for all she'd convinced herself otherwise - but Naoto kept kicking and thrashing on the bedroom floor, all sharp elbows and knees and fists, and dammit, he only had two hands, what was he gonna do, kneel on top of her?

Kanji let go of her arms and leaned back. "Stop it, Naoto, you're fine, s'okay, you're gonna-"

He'd planned on grabbing her legs instead, until her knee crashed hard into his ribs and her hand flailed towards his hair, clenched it tight at the roots. "Ah-!"

Shit, it _hurt_. He curled his fingers over hers and tried to pull them away. "Dammit! Naoto, don't-"

She bared her teeth - blood between them, she must've bit her tongue when she'd hit the floor - and tugged harder, made this noise with no words in it which was just fucking _wrong_ for Naoto. Her eyes were open but she wasn't seeing him, she couldn't be, because she looked terrified and she still wouldn't let go. Kanji did the only thing he could think of: wrapping his arms around her and holding tight. "It's fine, Naoto, right here - it's _fine_, c'mon."

She was breathing hard, chest heaving against his, t-shirt drenched with sweat. One fist still pulled weakly at his hair and the other was balled against his shoulder.

"I-I di'nt mean, I.." The words were slurred, thick in her mouth.

And Kanji thought, _is this what it was like last year, how the hell did I miss this, what was I doing._

His next thought was, _is this what's happening to Souji too, because if it is we're-_

"Is, it's not...I wasn'..."

"S'fine," he whispered again.

Naoto's hand finally untangled from his hair. She wasn't lashing out anymore and he thought, okay, he could put her down - until she started shaking. Convulsing, almost, her teeth chattering. "I-I'm sorry," she choked out, half-sobbing. Kanji felt his throat constrict in turn, so tight he couldn't ask _what for._

Should get her back on the bed, that was a good idea - because with something to focus on, he might stop feeling like his chest was about to cave in. Like he needed to apologize too, for never realizing she'd been lying.

Kanji half-lifted, half-dragged them onto the bed without letting go. They were left facing each other: Naoto a tight comma, him stretched out so his feet slipped off the end of the bed. He barely breathed for a while, too busy checking she was still doing it between the shudders and choked noises, until both finally stopped.

"Alright?" he murmured, running a hand through her hair.

It wasn't really a question - but when Naoto tucked her head closer and pressed her damp fingers against his jaw, it still felt like an answer.

* * *

**__****_21-04-12_**

The muted, fogged-out daylight nagging at his eyelids was starting to get on his nerves. Still, the room was warm and the bed was comfortable - even accounting for the strands of hair tickling his chin, the knee poking his ribs and the foot pressed against his left hip. So comfortable, it took Kanji a moment to realize it was physically impossible for any of those things to be his own.

His eyes flew open. Not his bedroom, the spare room: white walls, blue bed-sheets. Naoto Shirogane curled against his chest with her head burrowed against his neck: dark hair brushing against his jaw, one leg wrapped round his waist.

Shit. Ma was going to _kill_ him. Naoto too, because there was no way he could untangle himself without waking up; her arms and legs were _everywhere_.

Maybe he should just make a break for it. Or tap her on the head, act casual.

But nothing had happened, right? And it wasn't like they hadn't been in bed together in the past, or _on_ a bed at least. He remembered it from last year, because it was the night before-

"...Kanji-kun?"

It was very quiet, slightly sleepy, and came from Naoto, who had her fists bunched up tight against his chest.

"Uh. Yeah."

_Three, two, one._

Naoto jerked backwards, legs instantly untangling. "Why-why are you _here_? What did you-"

"Hey! C'mon, you should remember why!"

Her expression flickered. "…Ah." She rolled over, then sat up and ran a hand through her disheveled hair. There was something vulnerable in it, something Kanji didn't want to admit to, because Naoto had already _said_ she didn't want protecting - and because every other time he'd felt like that, it'd ended badly.

He quickly turned away and fixed his gaze on the wall by the bed.

"So, uh..." He swallowed. "Uh, are you oka-"

"Yes."

_Liar,_ Kanji thought.

"Didn't seem like it last night," he said.

"It-it was nothing." When he turned back, Naoto was already on her feet and tugging the sheets on her side back into place. "Just a dream."

"You told me they got better."

"They're less frequent. Which is better."

And sure, that was technically true, but frequency didn't count for shit when she was thrashing around and crying out in her sleep. Kanji shook his head. "C'mon, Naoto. It ain't-"

The pips of a cellphone - Naoto's - cut him off, and his own sounded down the hall a second later. He always slept like a log, so he kept the volume turned up to maximum.

She grabbed her phone from the table and flipped it open. "It's from Souji-senpai," she said, handing it to Kanji. He sat up and looked at the screen.

_**Meeting at Junes, 10.00.**_

Souji had never been one for long messages. Texted like he was sending telegrams, Yosuke always said.

Fuck. Yosuke would probably be there too. All of them would.

Naoto took the phone back and flipped it shut. "It's already nine. I will shower first." She grabbed her towel and her clothes - laid out neatly the night before, of course - and left the room.

Kanji, meanwhile, sat on the edge of the bed and stared out the window, trying to forget Naoto's fingers clawing at his hair and the blood between her teeth. More than anything he tried to forget falling asleep with her curled against him, because that was all last year - just like the meeting with the team today.

The fog pressed against the glass, air thick as ash. Kanji closed his eyes and saw white hospital corridors; static on a screen; Naoto letting go of his hand.

* * *

**__****_21-04-12_**

Honestly? Souji looked like crap. Exhausted, maybe haunted, and even in the dim fog Kanji swore there were shadows cast on his face. He looked even worse than the day he'd come to talk with Naoto, and that was saying something.

"You okay, Senpai?" Stupid question, Tatsumi, of course he wasn't, _look_ at him.

Souji gave a quick nod, but said nothing. Naoto didn't speak up either and Kanji was stuck sitting between them, which forced him into to his least favorite activity: keeping up a conversation. "Sorry we didn't get to see you last night," he mumbled. "They, uh, weren't letting anyone else in 'cept family."

"It's fine," Souji said.

"Cool, cool. So...you, uh - you..." Kanji was this close to standing up and flipping the table just to get something out of Souji other than that blank stare, because his eyes - not his face, not the dark circles, his _eyes_ - were all wrong.

"Hey guys! Am I late?"

For better or worse, Rise had amazing timing. She swept into the food court, smiling all the way and wearing something that would've been a perfectly good coat if some idiot hadn't stuck fluffy purple pompoms to the front.

"Senpai, are you doing okay? Do you need anything?" She slid into the seat next to Souji and winked at him. "How about I cook you breakfast?"

This actually got a smile out of him - Rise just had a knack - and Kanji felt stupidly glad.

"That'd put him out of action for certain, Rise-chan, and you know it!" Chie walked out the store doors, Yukiko in tow. There was an open spot to Naoto's left, but Chie still circled the table to sit next to Rise. Kanji briefly contemplated picking up either one of them and sticking them in the empty seat himself - until Yukiko quietly pulled out the chair next to Naoto and sat down. When he glanced at her, she smiled.

Chie was oblivious, her attention understandably focused on Souji. "Hey, shouldn't you be resting after yesterday?"

"No need." Souji looked toward the doors. "Did you see Yosuke on your way?"

"Yeah. Said he had to find Teddie inside the store." She rolled her eyes. "Probably chatting up the samples lady again. Yosuke said he'd already tried twice this morning. I swear, that bear is-"

The glass doors slid open a third time. Teddie rushed out first and ran over to Souji, babbling at him that the sample lady _really_ liked him and Yosuke was just being mean. "All good bears try to make new friends, Sensei!"

"Absolutely," Souji said, in the way that meant he was ignoring someone completely - there'd been time enough for Kanji to learn _that _tone lately - and kept staring towards the door until Yosuke finally slouched through.

"Hey partner." He took the seat to Yukiko's left, pointedly ignoring Naoto.

Still, better he blank her than start a fight. Naoto might keep her temper but Kanji sure as hell wouldn't, and punching someone out in the middle of the Junes food court was exactly the kind of thing he hoped he'd given up.

For some reason, having Yosuke there seemed to fire some life back into Souji. He nodded in greeting, then glanced between Yosuke and Teddie. "You checked inside the television, right?"

"Of course, Sensei! But it's still foggy on the other side."

Souji hummed in thought. "Thought so."

"But that doesn't make sense," grumbled Chie. "Fog here _and_ there."

"Look on the bright side, guys," said Rise. "At least there haven't been any new murders."

"Because no-one's throwing people in," Yosuke muttered, glaring straight at Naoto.

The table fell quiet.

Everyone kept looking everywhere except at each other, to the point where it almost made Kanji laugh with how damn stupid it was. The exception was Naoto: perfect and impassive, eyes firmly on Souji.

Whatever. Kanji clenched his teeth and decided he'd kick Hanamura's ass in private later.

"So, Souji," Chie finally asked, in a way that was probably meant to sound cheerful, "why are we sitting here when you ought to be resting in bed?"

Souji opened his mouth as if to speak, then closed it again, hesitating. "I've been thinking," he eventually said. "Mostly about the Midnight Channel. Why it showed the victims ahead of time, and how it relates to that other world."

"We never really figured any of that out, Sensei," Teddie said, and sighed. "Even _I_ don't know much."

"Then maybe we should start at the beginning." Souji glanced around the table. "How did you guys hear about the Midnight Channel?"

"From the customers in the shop," said Rise. "Plus you guys, later."

"I heard from Chie," Yukiko said.

"Me too." Yosuke turned to Chie. "Who told you?"

She shrugged, frowning at the table's surface. "I just caught the rumours at school. Everyone was talking about it, I thought it'd be a fun thing to try."

"Naoto?" asked Souji.

"I – don't remember."

The expression on Souji's face was strange: an odd mix of satisfaction and apprehension. Like he'd been right about something when he wanted to be wrong. "I thought so. And it was the same for me." He reached down to the bag at his side, pulled out a batch of papers, and placed them on the table. "Until I read these."

Naoto leaned forward to peer at the top sheet. "Transcripts of Namatame's interviews with the police."

"Yeah. I persuaded my uncle to get me copies. Most of them were conducted in early December, so Namatame wasn't really coherent - but he mentioned several times that someone told him about the Midnight Channel on the day he returned to Inaba, and that he'd thought it was a rumour until he saw Mayumi Yamano. He just couldn't remember who'd told him." A slight frown creased Souji's forehead. "I think the same happened to me...and I don't remember who it was either." He eyed Naoto carefully. "What about you?"

"I-" Naoto started, then stopped. Her jaw tensed for a moment before she spoke again. "Yes, someone _did_ tell me. But I - I can't remember their face or where we were."

"Convenient," Yosuke snorted.

"No, it ain't!" Kanji smacked a palm on the table, hard enough to sting his skin and make Rise jump from two seats away. "She told me that last year too, that someone had told her." He turned to Naoto. "But I don't remember who you said it was."

Which, thinking about it, freaked him out. No matter how hard he racked his memory, that one bit of detail was missing. They'd been at her apartment when she'd told him, she'd been trying to help him with his English homework, he remembered all of that – so why couldn't he remember what she'd said?

Naoto shook her head. "It's improbable that all of us would simply forget. Collective memory loss would be unprecedented, particularly of presumably separate events."

"What're you guys getting at?" Chie's tone was far too suspicious. "I mean, why would it matter how you heard about the Midnight Channel?"

"None of you could enter the television alone before defeating your Shadow," said Souji. "Namatame, Naoto and myself are the exception, and there has to be a reason for that." He picked up the papers and slipped them back into his bag. "I didn't think it was important at first either, but I've been reading and rereading these interviews and this - memory loss regarding the Channel is the only thing that stands out."

Yosuke eyebrows arched. "You seriously think it means anything? I know we barely understand anything about the TV world - but isn't it kind of a stretch?"

Souji tilted back his head and squeezed his eyes shut. "I - I might be on the wrong track. But right now, the only connection between the three of us is that we don't remember how we heard about the Midnight Channel. So, I need to find out who told me - and I need all of you to be prepared."

It was pretty telling, Kanji thought, that nobody asked _for what_.

Souji's eyes snapped open, and he stood from his chair. "Naoto-kun, come with me."

Naoto got up, so Kanji did too, because that was how it worked - until she turned to him and shook her head.

"Stay here," she told him. "I will be fine."

Which was okay. Kanji didn't care. He didn't care and that was why he didn't say or do anything except stare at the table, hating himself for acting like a little kid.

"Just you two?" For once, there was no trace of contempt in Yosuke's voice. Only fear.

"Yeah," Souji insisted. "We'll be fine." Then he took Naoto's hand - Kanji's jaw tightening till it ached - and they both walked away from the table and back inside the store.

And all this had been easier before. It'd been easier when Naoto had been gone, easier still before he'd even known who she was, because he hadn't cared about who held whose hand, or the way someone's eyes looked, or how their touch felt or whether they even gave a damn he was there. Now those things mattered so much, it hurt - and Kanji had to sit, swallow, and pretend he didn't care.


	4. Chapter 4

**4.**

"The Midnight Channel was not the reason you called the meeting." Naoto didn't bother to phrase it as a question. At this stage, pleasantries only wasted time.

Souji shook his head. "No. You know why I did."

"Because you dreamed last night."

"Yes. Worse than ever. You did too." He glanced at her. "That's why you look exhausted, right?"

"Yet you chose not to inform the team."

"What good would it do?" His voice was harsh and firm, but his next breath ended in a sigh. "I can't tell the others that I'm basing my decisions on dreams. They'll think I'm heading the same way you did."

_You are_, Naoto didn't say, _you are, except you might actually beat us. _

She had needed to appear infallible because people had not listened. Souji needed to appear infallible because people did. The base desire remained the same and led to an isolation that could only be answered by power, which there were few noble ways to obtain. Power was one thing Naoto had always lacked, save for a brief and bittersweet taste last year, and in the end her puppeteer had still held the strings. Souji, however, might break them.

She took a deep breath – breathing in thick fog, half-expecting it to choke her – and exhaled slowly. "I - don't know what the dreams mean," she said. "They feel like -"

"Warnings."

Since returning to Inaba, _everything_ had felt like a warning; signs and portents everywhere, from the fabric of her dreams to the books she'd spent hours poring over, night after night. There was a message contained in it all that Naoto hadn't been able to decode. Too many parts were missing or distorted, like a signal swallowed by static.

As they'd walked further away from Junes, the streets had grown emptier. Quieter, too, even accounting for the fog muffling every sound. Her glasses cut through it with ease, but it felt no less oppressive.

"Where are we heading?" she asked Souji.

"Back to my uncle's house," he said. "He and Nanako-chan met me at the train station when I first arrived here. I don't think either of them told me about the Channel, but maybe they weren't the only people I met that day. They might remember if we stopped anywhere on the way home." Souji sighed, and ran a hand through his hair. "There are _gaps_, Naoto. Parts of last year are just gone."

"I know." She remembered little between April and July, and virtually nothing between then and September.

(After that it was almost all Kanji, whom she chose to think about no further.)

"The first month I was here is hazy. Don't tell Yosuke or the others this, but I barely remember meeting them on my first day at school," Souji said, wincing. "But I'm pretty sure I knew about the Channel before then, which means somebody told me almost straight after I arrived."

Naoto hummed in thought. "Thinking of it, I believe I knew of the Channel prior to my first visit to the police station." But what had happened on her first day in Inaba? Adachi had been the one to drive her from the train station to her apartment, but the other events of the day were mired in fog. She shook her head. "It's difficult to remember. I may simply be filling in the gaps with assumptions."

"We'll ask my uncle what happened. Might jog your memory too."

"…I doubt Dojima-san will welcome my presence."

"No, he won't. But it'll have to happen eventually, especially when you go back to working with the police." Souji laid his palm on her back, between her shoulder blades. "You're still a detective."

_Am I,_ Naoto thought.

* * *

Kanji was a little preoccupied with hunching over and glowering at the table, so he didn't notice Yosuke slide into the seat next to him at first.

"Hey, man."

First time he'd spoken to Kanji since Naoto got back. No big surprise there. In Hanamura's eyes, Kanji had probably already picked his side. "S'up."

"Nothing much. Just..." Yosuke shifted in his chair, the creak of the plastic overlaying the tinny echo of the headphones round his neck. "You sure about - you know."

A heavy, confused anger had been churning in Kanji's gut since Naoto and Souji had left, and Hanamura's shitty, half-rhetorical questions were the very last thing he wanted to deal with. "Yeah. I am."

"But what if-"

"Look, I already told all'a you, alright? She's fine now, she's _fine_. Quit poking at her."

Yosuke leaned back in the chair, arms folded. "That's not what I'm talking about. You saw her. Just went straight off with Souji."

The muscles in Kanji's shoulders had coiled up like springs.

"Kinda odd, right?" Yosuke continued, too lightly, still pushing and _pushing_. "After everything she did, now they're best buds."

_Shut it, Hanamura._ "None of my business."

"Dude, come on!" Yosuke's voice had turned fierce and taut. Kanji looked at him, then, _really_ looked at him: jaw clenched, expression strained, eyes blazing. It was like staring in a mirror. "You and her had a thing, now she's all over Souji like a rash and she's probably going to-"

"Shut up." It wasn't a snap, or a shout - more a guttural growl that rolled through Kanji's aching chest. "I don't fucking care, okay?"

Yosuke lunged forward, now half-standing. "Kanji, she tried to kill us! She tried to kill Nanako-chan! And, fine, I'm listening to Souji on this one, but we still don't even know if Saki-senpai and Yamano-"

Kanji's hand was balled into a fist before he realized. It took all the self-control he had to smash it against the table instead. "Shut up! Don't even _think_ it!"

For a long moment, Yosuke just glared at him. Finally, he slouched back into his seat again and started fiddling with his MP3 player. "Yeah, well. Should've guessed you'd be _biased_," he said, without looking up. "Guess I'm the only one with any sense here."

Kanji glanced across the court. Chie, Rise and Yukiko were queued up at the drinks stand, waiting for a bored looking shop-boy to finish their orders. "The girls ain't on your side then?" He laughed, but it came out hollow. "Poor bastard."

A scowl instantly creased Yosuke's face, but turned into a sigh a moment later as he swept his hair back behind his ears. "Look...if Naoto can help Souji, then we need her. But I'm still wondering. You can throw a dozen tantrums, but nothing's gonna change that." He leaned forward again, and the look in his eyes turned Kanji's stomach. "He's my best friend, Kanji, and I won't let it happen all over again. Not a chance."

* * *

"You sure you should be walking about?"

Naoto had encountered few people in her career who she'd considered vaguely competent, much less worthy of respect. Ryotaro Dojima was an exception on both counts, despite his initial animosity toward her. He also remained the only member of the Inaba police force who had concurred with her theory that Kubo was not the true killer - even if he had left her to the wolves in the end, when the higher-ups had insisted on closing the case.

He stared at Souji now, brow furrowed. Profiling, evaluating. It became second nature.

"I'm fine," Souji lied, smooth as rain. "Just needed a good night's sleep." The irony was almost painful.

Dojima nodded slowly, no trace of belief in his expression, then tipped his head toward the closed door behind him. "Nanako-chan was worried about you."

"Sorry. I should've spoken to her before I left this morning, but I was in a hurry."

"She wants to make you lunch today." He arched an eyebrow, a smile tugging at his lips. "Think she's trying to stop you from eating out of the fridge."

Souji laughed softly, letting Dojima pat him firmly on the shoulder as he opened the front door and entered the house.

Naoto did not follow.

"Shirogane."

Face Dojima's justified anger, or the child she befriended and attempted to kill. There was no contest.

She squared her shoulders. "Dojima-san."

The naked contempt in his expression was expected. The edge of disappointment wasn't. "Keep your damn courtesy," he told her. "I won't pretend I understand even half of what happened last year. Monsters, people getting thrown in televisions..." He shook his head with a grunt. "Souji's given up trying to explain it to me."

Which was for the best. There were some things that simply couldn't be explained, no matter how many words you used or analogies you devised. The world Naoto knew was too far outside Dojima's frame of reference, did not fit in any of the neat boxes constructed during his twenty years as a police officer in a quiet rural town. His mind remained closed. Perhaps that was why the investigation team consisted only of children - herself included.

Dojima unfolded his arms. One hand moved to his shirt pocket and pulled a cigarette from the open box tucked inside. "And you know something? I don't care. I don't need to understand it. I know the most important thing – Nanako's all I have left." He flicked open his lighter. "And because of you, I almost lost her."

"Dojima-san, I-"

"Save it. Words won't change a damn thing." He grimaced. "I trust Souji, and I know something's up - and if it's connected with that television-monsters-whatever crap, you're going to help, got it? You owe it to me, to Nanako, and most of all to him."

Naoto swallowed. Her shirt collar felt suddenly tight. "What makes you think I will be of use?"

"Shirogane, I checked your record before you arrived last year. You were a damn good detective before you came here." Smoke curled upwards, barely visible in the fog. "None of the officers on those other cases you handled would've cut you any breaks, and you still helped crack every one. You can help Souji."

The sudden swell of pride - something Naoto hadn't felt in months - did nothing to stop the hot coils twisting inside her stomach.

Dojima apparently mistook her silence for disdain. "Hated me too, right? Just another adult?"

She took a deep breath. "Sometimes." _Because you're good but I'm better, yet still they pushed me aside._

He leaned down almost to her eye level. "Get over it, Shirogane. Help Souji."

"Am I interrupting?"

When she peered around Dojima's shoulder, Souji was standing in the doorway. He walked out into the fog with slow steps, a green bento box clasped in his hands.

"No." Dojima straightened, with a final warning glance at Naoto. "Shirogane and I were just talking. So, what was the question you had?"

Souji tilted his head, almost indifferently. "It's about the day I arrived in Inaba."

* * *

_hey you alright? let me know if u need me_

Naoto flipped her phone shut and slipped it back in her coat pocket. This was the second text Kanji had sent her in the hour since she'd left the food court.

"The gas station. Uncle's right, I remember going there, I remember talking to someone, but-" Souji stopped short, suddenly wincing.

It was the same for her. Naoto now remembered Adachi stopping there for gas after he'd collected her from the train station, and she vaguely recalled an unwanted conversation with someone while she'd been waiting by the pump. Trivial content, the weather or something similarly mundane. But when she tried to picture the other speaker, a wrenching, corkscrew pain bored into the back of her skull, enough for her vision to flash white at the edges.

She glanced sideways. Though Souji still looked pained, the contours of his profile were the same as ever. Strong jaw, narrow eyes, low cheekbones. Tired, a little thinner in the face, but still convincing enough that the others took him at his word one day after he'd collapsed in a schoolyard. Naoto thought of herself last year - sleepless, gaunt, hollow-eyed, to the point where Kanji Tatsumi had felt it necessary to come to her apartment and babysit her - and felt her chest tighten, as if her ribs were about to cave in and crush the resentment clawing beneath.

Her phone buzzed yet again, and she pulled it from her pocket.

_just want to make sure ur okay. comin back soon right?_

"That's Kanji?"

She swallowed. "Yes."

"You should've counted on him more. You should now," Souji said, without meeting her eye. "Tell him what's been happening to you."

What still happened _now_, Naoto mentally corrected him, more and more, day by day. It hit worst at night, when the spare room at the textiles store was black and airless but there were still shadows climbing the blinds, the walls, the ceiling, and she was desperate not to dream but couldn't fathom staying awake with a mind full of all of _this_, this jumble she'd been trying to untangle into orderly parallel lines since the middle of last year - so she imagined her skull splitting open under the pressure, all the twisted bone and grey matter pouring out, and she had to press her forehead hard against the wall and bite down on her tongue to keep from screaming.

Naoto couldn't imagine explaining this to Kanji, not with all the hours and words in the world. The only reason Souji understood was their unspoken assumption that their experiences were near-identical.

"Who have _you_ told?" she asked.

At her side, Souji's strides grew stiffer. "I've been as honest as I can."

Naoto said nothing.

Down by the floodplains, the fog was even thicker. They'd discarded their glasses after leaving Souji's house - wearing them had only seemed to worsen their headaches - but she could still see Souji wince again beside her and pinch the bridge of his nose between two fingers.

"Stop thinking," she told him, and he laughed.

"Been trying that for months, Naoto-kun." He paused. "Want to contact the others?"

"No."

"Good."

They kept walking, out through the park gates and toward the gas station. When her phone buzzed for the third time, Naoto ignored it.

* * *

By now, Kanji was getting desperate. Naoto had been gone for ages, she was ignoring his text messages, Rise and Chie wouldn't quit gabbing and Yosuke was sulking over by the picnic tables with his headphones turned up full blast. It was past two o'clock, so Yukiko had already caught the bus to the shopping district to run errands. Maybe he should head back to the store as well, wait for Naoto there. Or maybe he should go find her with Souji. Bust up their little party.

_When the hell did I get so jealous,_ Kanji wondered, letting out a long, slow breath.

Teddie flopped down in the next seat. "What's wrong, Kanji-kun?"

Ted was harmless. Ted was also, on occasion, incredibly annoying. "Nothin'," Kanji muttered, and waited for him to leave.

"I don't think so." He narrowed his eyes and peered closely at Kanji. His whole body thrummed with sheer concentration, and at any other time it might've cracked Kanji up. "I think you're mad that Sensei left with Nao-chan."

Kanji grit his teeth. "The hell would you know 'bout that?"

"Bears just do." Ted leaned forward, resting his arms on the table and his chin on top of them. "Also, Rise-chan said so."

"Yeah, well, Rise shouldn't be blabbing about that shit! It ain't her business."

Kanji had said it louder than he'd meant. Rise looked up at him from three meters away, where she was standing by the fence with Chie. "Shouldn't be blabbing about what, Kanji-kun?" she chirped as she walked over. "That Souji-senpai swept Naoto-kun off her feet?"

He took a deep breath. _Keep it together, Tatsumi_.

"It _ain't_ like that, Rise, she's trying to help him. Figure out why he's been getting sick. So just – just shut it, alright?" He heard a phone ring, thought for a second that it might be Naoto calling back - then realized it wasn't his. Across the food court, he saw Chie pull hers from her pocket.

A small, hurt frown creased Rise's forehead. "C'mon, Kanji-kun. I'm just teasing. Senpai _isn't_ into Naoto-kun, especially not after - you know." She laid a hand on his shoulder and smiled. Both actions looked forced. "I was just trying to lighten the mood."

"Well, it didn't work," Kanji muttered - but that was shitty of him, Rise was trying her best. He grunted, ran a hand through his hair, and tried again. "Sorry. Don't mean to be an ass. Just don't get why they went off t'gether."

Rise's expression flickered with something Kanji couldn't quite name; something which made him suspect he wasn't the only one bothered by Souji asking Naoto to go with him. It vanished in a moment, replaced by another strained smile. "Well, Naoto-kun's really smart. Senpai probably wants her to help him think stuff through."

"Or to keep an eye on her," Yosuke said as he approached the table, headphones back round his neck.

"_I_ can do that," Kanji snapped. "I can do that just fine."

The way that Rise and Yosuke glanced sideways at each other made him want to punch a hole in the damn floor.

Teddie grinned, oblivious. "Well, that's good! Nao-chan needs looking after. You and Sensei can both do it."

"But she's got _me_, he don't need to-"

The rest of the retort was cut off by Chie practically crashing into the table. "Guys, shut up and listen!" she ordered, shoving her phone into the center of the group. "Yukiko, you're on speaker, tell them!"

_"I-I...everyone, something's happened, I-"_ Yukiko was gasping for breath, like she'd been running. _"I saw them, Souji and Naoto-kun, I –I'd just gotten off the bus and they were talking to someone at the gas station but the person _changed_, I couldn't - th-there was this light, and, and-"_

Yosuke snatched the phone from Chie's hand. "What happened to Souji? Is he still there?"

_"I don't - I-I saw a space in the air, it just opened up between them and the person, but it was red and black." _ Another deep, ragged breath. _"Naoto-kun grabbed Souji's arm but the person was already off the ground, and there was another flash of light, and I - I can't see them anymore, they're gone! You all need to come here now, please!"_

Kanji needed to get up, leave, go fix this, but there was blood throbbing in his ears and his body refused to move - until Yosuke's hand snared around the collar of his shirt.

"I told you! I _told_ you, she did it all over again, she-"

Kanji shot up and shoved Yosuke hard, backwards over a chair and onto the ground. He was through the store's glass doors before anyone could speak.


	5. Chapter 5

**5.**

If it'd been up to Kanji, he'd have started running the moment he stepped out of Junes – but Rise had caught up to him as he strode through the store and calmed him down a little, or at least enough so he could sit on the bus with the others and not want to throw Hanamura under the wheels. She was sitting next to him now, twisting locks of hair around her fingers and shooting the occasional nervous glance at the clock on her cell phone.

Chie twisted in her seat to face them, her own phone held to her ear. "Yukiko says there's still no sign of Souji or Naoto-kun. She's waiting at the gas station."

Shit. Something bad had happened to Naoto, and to Senpai too, and Kanji was stuck sitting on a fucking bus. The slow crawl through the fog made the trip take twice as long, or at least feel that way.

"It's fine, Yukiko," Chie was saying into her phone. "It – doesn't sound like you could've done anything." They'd kept the call going ever since the food court. Kanji would've said that Chie just wanted to comfort Yukiko, but now he had the feeling it went both ways. In a crappy situation, maybe you just looked for the person you felt most safe around.

...He didn't feel safe around Naoto. Or rather he had, and sometimes still did, but now there was a wariness between them, this feeling that he always had to be on guard – and so all the stuff Hanamura had been spouting had hit home.

Kanji glanced at Yosuke on his right, sitting on the opposite side of the aisle with his head pressed against the fogged-up bus window, and felt a sudden pang of sympathy. One thing they had in common: being shit-scared of losing the people they cared about. People they didn't always know how to help.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, they found Yukiko standing outside the gas station, clutching a bento box and looking thoroughly lost.

"I – I'm sorry, everyone," she told them, fingers tight against the green plastic, "I tried, I-I didn't know what to—"

Chie shushed her, then slung an arm over her shoulder and pulled her into a half-hug. "Hey, it's not your fault, okay?"

And it _wasn't_, Kanji knew that, just like he knew that Yukiko couldn't have done anything to stop whatever had taken Naoto and Souji. But some small, stupid part of him was pissed at her all the same, and he had to walk a few meters away before it spoke up. Might as well make himself useful. They needed to hunt for clues, some hint on what the hell had happened. He glanced around the station forecourt. Gas pumps, gaudy advertisements, a rickety-looking soda machine – all of it useless. Everything looked _normal_.

"I don't get it. It doesn't seem like anything even happened," Rise said, somewhere behind him.

"Dammit, we should've gotten here sooner!" Yosuke snapped. "Whose idea was it wait for the _bus_ instead of running?"

Kanji had known from the start they'd get here too late, that there had been no real point rushing other than to comfort Yukiko. Whatever had taken Naoto and Souji had been gone before she'd pulled out her phone. "Forget that shit, we gotta figure out what happened to them."

At that, Yosuke gave a look: one stuffed full with things he no longer dared to say. _It was Naoto, just like before, all over again. _Kanji turned away, flexing his fingers to keep them from curling into fists. "Y'see anything else, Yukiko-senpai?"

"Only what I told you. I'm sorry." Yukiko shook her head. Beside her, Chie mumbled something Kanji wasn't near enough to hear. "And – I don't think anyone else would have seen anything, not with the fog."

Without glasses, a person couldn't see more than a couple meters. But what if they didn't need to see that far? Maybe they were standing close by the whole time, Kanji thought, and an idea was sparked. "Hey, what 'bout the atte-"

Jagged pain seared through his skull, like nails driving through the bone. He hissed and clutched at his head, the rest of the sentence cut off - and, when he finally recovered his wits, forgotten. Though the whole process lasted only a few seconds, it didn't go unnoticed.

"What about the what?" Chie peered at him carefully. "You okay, Kanji-kun?"

He swallowed, rubbing his head. "Yeah. Fine."

"Any thoughts, Teddie?" asked Rise.

Ted had been quiet since they'd left Junes. He stared up at empty space, brows knitted with worry. "Yuki-chan said the sky turned red and black when Sensei and Nao-chan disappeared. That sounds like a portal."

Rise's eyes widened. "Just like the ones we have inside the TV world!" she said, and Ted nodded.

Once they'd gotten off the bus, Yosuke had barely stopped moving, body thrumming with nervous energy. "So that's where they went?"

"Maybe. But it's bear-y hard to know without going inside."

"I don't like going in without Souji," Chie said, with a tight, nervous shrug, "but what other choice do we have?"

Kanji gave a grim nod, eyes focused on the murky grey sky; like he'd be able see where Naoto had gone if he just looked hard enough. He let out a long breath, and turned back to the team. "Guess we know where t'start, then."

* * *

Chie hopped from one foot to the other, steps echoing through the studio lot. "Found anything yet, Rise?"

Beneath Kanzeon's translucent visor, Rise shook her head. "Nothing. I'm trying, but I can't hear Souji-senpai or Naoto-kun anywhere."

Yosuke made a tight, angry sound, something between a yelp and a growl. "There has to be _something_, keep trying! Yukiko, are you sure you don't remember anything else?"

"Only what I told you. I'm sorry," Yukiko said, even more quietly than usual.

"Give her a break, Yosuke." The glare Chie shot him was as half-hearted as her tone. "We're all strung out right now, okay?"

"Don't worry, everyone! My nose isn't that great anymore, but if I team up with Rise-chan, we're unstoppable!" Teddie was back in his bear-suit again, standing next to Rise as Kanzeon shimmered behind them both. "If Sensei and Nao-chan are in here, we'll find them."

Yosuke grimaced, one foot tapping rapid-fire against the floor of the studio lot. "They might not be. But it's our best shot."

Worst part was, Hanamura was right for once. They hadn't found a damn thing out by the gas station. No clues, no evidence, no sign that Naoto and Souji had even been there. If Yukiko hadn't been walking past, the team would never have known what had happened to them. The idea might have terrified Kanji, if his mind wasn't constantly churning out far worse scenarios. What if Naoto really _was_ involved in this? Had he been so badly wrong about her? And the worst thought of all was that none of it would matter anyway: that Souji and Naoto had been lost long before the team had jumped back inside the TV.

"We'll find them," Chie said, with a confidence Kanji wished he felt. "A gap opening up in the air like that - they had to go _somewhere_."

"Guys..." Rise's voice was thin and strained. "There's a new place here. Not where Naoto-kun was before, something else. And I - I think they're there."

"Both of them?" Yosuke asked, too quickly.

"...Yeah. But they're - different. Souji-senpai - he's _changed_, and Naoto-kun's just like bef-"

She cut herself off - but Kanji didn't need to see below the visor to know that she was looking at him, or what the rest of the sentence would've been.

* * *

"This is your share," Yosuke said, handing Kanji a fold of bills.

He flicked through them quickly; had to be what, fifty-thousand yen? He glanced up at Yosuke, standing in the doorway to the textiles shop. Good thing Ma was already asleep, she'd never quit complaining about him letting in the cold. "Souji-senpai had you hang onto all this?"

"Yeah. Gave it to me this morning. Said it was 'just in case'." Yosuke let out a long breath and ran a hand through his hair. "I thought he was talking about ending up in the hospital again."

The team were basically leaderless now, but Yosuke had tried to step into the role as best he could. Maybe that was exactly what Souji had hoped for. "You think Senpai knew what was gonna happen?"

Yosuke leaned against the wooden doorframe, arms folded. The pause before he answered was just long enough to be awkward. "Nah. He would've told me, right?"

Kanji's body was buzzing with frustration, nausea and a dozen other things he couldn't put a name to because they were chopped up and tangled and jumbled. "Yeah," he said, not meaning it. "We should've gone today."

"Dude, you know I'm with you on that. But Chie..." Yosuke grunted, then shrugged. "It's funny, she's always the one kicking me in the nuts soon as she gets mad and now she's fussing about _preparations._"

They'd left Naoto inside for days last time. Training, preparing, all that crap, while she'd been stuck in there by herself, getting more and more messed up. Part of Kanji still thought that if they'd gotten to her sooner, they'd never have needed to fight - but in the end, it didn't make much difference.

He slipped the bills in the back pocket of his jeans. "Gonna stop at Daidara's tomorrow. You and Ted hitting the general store?"

"Yeah. We'll meet at Junes around ten. Later, Kanji." Yosuke turned away, one hand pressed against the doorframe.

"Wait, man," Kanji said, before he could leave. "About what happened earlier. I'm sorry."

"Yeah. I know. You were just worried," Yosuke said, without looking back. "But you've gotta be ready for this, dude, just like last time."

A sick, prickling heat rushed through Kanji's chest. "Yeah. 'Course."

Yosuke nodded one more time, then stepped out into the fog. He headed off toward the bus stop, and without the glasses Kanji lost sight of him within seconds.

His legs ached as he walked through the store and up the stairs, like the muscles were stretched too taut over his bones. At the top, he went to the spare room instead of his own, because he needed to straighten out the sheets from this morning - and because he was stupid and pathetic and just wanted to curl up on the bed and pretend he wasn't alone. The mattress shifted when he flopped down, and when he quickly steadied himself on the side table, his hands brushed over something round and metallic.

He pulled the pocket watch chain to the edge of the table's surface and lifted it above his head. He hadn't held it since Naoto got back. Always kept it with her, even at night.

Kanji pressed his head against the pillow. He didn't sleep.

* * *

Everything was cold, and her eyes ached.

The sky and the ground were the same dull grey, same as where they'd been before and the only way she knew the difference as the red and black squares, a chessboard: pawns and queens. Naoto felt hollowed-out, scooped-out, as if a blade had sliced her from collarbone to groin and left blood and organs and severed muscle to puddle uselessly at her feet.

_(She tells a doctor in the hospital something similar in late January, in one of her less lucid moments. He squints, nods and scribbles in his notebook. Then he sends Naoto back to her room, where she stacks the unopened letters in her suitcase in orderly columns and tries to match her hammering pulse with the steady tick of the watch in her pocket.)_

For one moment, the nausea became too much. She dropped to her knees, gagging and vomiting up bile. Her first thought: _that shouldn't happen, not if I'm hollow_. The idea was illogical - and perhaps that realization cleared her head as she pulled herself to her feet.

Souji was here. She'd watched him take that woman's hand inside a bright flash of light, hated that it wasn't her whom the woman had reached for first, because it _should _have been. Naoto abhorred Seta, despised his friends, resented everything from his knowing smiles to his effortless charm to the muscles that flexed when he lifted his sword.

_(The first jump inside the television last September isn't the most difficult - that's the second, three months later in an empty hospital room - but it still leaves a bitter taste on her tongue, because she knows exactly who will pull her back out.)_

Lost in the fog, stumbling along the red and black road and trying to ignore the voice that hissed with every heartbeat, Naoto knew she couldn't afford to think this way. Souji was lost in the same trap she'd once been. She needed to save them both. _Be rational_, she told herself, _remember what happened and how you arrived here _- but the blade was at her head now, carving one neat circle, and the grey matter inside (so important to everyone, so vital, until the moment she was no longer needed) spilled out with all the rest.

* * *

There was no portal this time. Rise and Teddie had to lead the team on foot and they'd already spent what felt like hours just walking through fog, _on _fog, so thick Kanji could barely see more than a meter ahead even with his glasses. Must be clogging up his chest, too, because that would explain why it felt so damn tight.

Yosuke stopped suddenly and held out one arm. "Wait. Look down."

They'd been walking on empty grey all the way here - something that bothered the hell out of Kanji, because how could you walk on nothing? - but now in the spaces where the fog thinned out were patches of red and black. As they moved further forward the patches became more and more frequent, eventually joining together to form a solid, recognizable path. For the first time since they'd arrived, they could hear their footsteps.

"Didn't Naoto-kun mention a road like this?" asked Yukiko, one hand nervously tapping the folded fan at her waist.

Rise nodded. "I think we're getting closer. Kanzeon couldn't see anything before, but now..." She frowned, peering around the empty fog. "I have a sense of how this place is laid out, kinda like the others. But it keeps shifting."

"Shifting?" Chie asked.

"Yeah. I - see, it's not like I know a place inside-out before you guys explore. I just have an idea of the structure. But Kanzeon says this one isn't stable, the layout keeps changing, even while we're walking."

"No Shadows either," Kanji said. "Just like in the other place. Maybe they don't want to hurt us."

"Bet you thought that last time," Yosuke muttered. "Be realistic, Kanji."

"Naoto didn't wanna attack us then, alright? She couldn't help it!"

If he was being honest, Kanji knew that wasn't the whole truth, only a huge simplification: the neat, tidy version that kept his heart from seizing up and let him look Naoto in the eye each day. And that was fine. He'd driven himself half-crazy for four months trying to straighten everything all out in his head, before he'd realized the simple explanation might be the best he'd ever do.

Yukiko's hand landed feather-light on his arm. "But she nearly won, Kanji-kun. I know Naoto-kun was in a lot of trouble then, but-"

"We'll take her down if we have to," Yosuke cut in. "We did before."

Kanji didn't mention that it might not only be Naoto they'd have to fight. He remembered how all this had felt last time, every last moment, and Yosuke didn't deserve any of that, no matter how blind or dickish he was being. Nobody did - but what people deserved, Kanji had come to realize, rarely made a difference. _Maybe it won't be Naoto at all_, he let himself think for just a second, before shoving the thought out his head.

"Stay sharp, guys." Rise's steps had slowed, and she latched onto his sleeve. "I think things are-"

There was a sudden lurch in his stomach, a ripple in the air – and everything shifted and whirled. Kanji had to screw his eyes shut to fight off the burst of nausea. Rise was still holding onto his shirt, he thought, so he grabbed her arm; heard Yukiko cry out behind him, followed by Yosuke's sudden yelp; then hit the deck hard as the world slammed to a halt.

Moments later, he opened his eyes to a blurred white mass, something he guessed might be a ceiling. His eyes followed it to the black edges where the walls joined up, traced converging black and white lines down, and watched them finally merge into grey and then become reflective silver.

He took a deep breath and let the world settle further. When his vision finally cleared completely and he was able to stand, he looked around a second time. The others were gradually stirring on the floor and every wall of the room was covered with mirrors. No exits.

A hand tugged at the fabric of his pants. Kanji glanced down to see Rise next to him on her knees, gripping his legs for support. "See, that was what I meant!"

To his left, Chie climbed unsteadily to her feet. She looked at the mirrors, and sighed. "Well, _this _isn't good."

* * *

The chessboard was gone. Naoto felt herself dissolving and turning inside out, saw nothing but dreams playing behind her eyelids, heard nothing but the voice still murmuring in the fog.

_(In July, two weeks after they bring the body down from the tower, she makes the mistake of listening. She has barely slept since her predecessor died, but the dreams have already shown her everything he did; everything an incompetent, misfit schoolboy will take responsibility for. __**The truth will out,**__ a voice insists - and that evening, the schoolboy vanishes.)_

No. That had been her choice. _Her _idea. Nothing to do with voices, Naoto told herself, and she felt the threads - tendons, maybe, skin and bones - start to knit back together. A whisper hissed in her ear, telling her to let go, and her muscles tightened.

_(In September, the schoolboy is rescued, but the children (and their ignorant, arrogant leader) are too stupid to understand. The dreams worsen and the voice grows louder each time. Naoto begins to take it at its word - soon the police will respect her, admire her, need her, no longer push her aside the end of every case - and when she stands in the interrogation room in early September, one arm already through the television screen, every action seems logical and absolute.)_

But that logic had been an illusion: a consequence of her mind twisting itself into new, distorted shapes to justify her actions. Risking one's life to solve a case was justifiable, but striding into the lion's den was suicide. Her actions had been foolhardy and meaningless - and the new world the voice had promised had never materialized.

She spread out her arms and felt a hard surface against her back.

_(In October, after two months of unwavering confidence, the threads start to unravel. Dealing with her Shadow is grueling and painful, particularly the resolution, and the voice is angry at her weakness. Naoto tries to retreat, to isolate herself from these children and regain her strength, but the raw and awkward boy who carried her home disrupts this. He appears at her door day after day, the voice grows angrier, and for the first time, Naoto begins to doubt.)_

Now on her hands and knees, Naoto tried to concentrate on the boy whose name she couldn't remember - but she saw the other boy instead, the one she still wasn't sure if she hated. For a moment the face of the boy was the face of a woman, so beautiful Naoto felt all the scraps and half-thoughts left inside her knotting up and being pulled out through her eyes and-

Teeth clenched, she fiercely shook her head.

_(In November, she feels the reins slipping through her fingers; wonders if she'd ever held them at all. The two voices cross over, one cold and insistent, the other inarticulate but kind. Naoto, unable to resolve the two, begins to fall apart. In a sterile hospital corridor, she finally realizes where her own bitterness has led her, but it's too late. Four words already drew the final line: __**throw the child in.**__)_

The hospital. She remembered that. She remembered the girl, too, but thinking of her - back turned in trust, one small hand tugging at Naoto's jacket - set things spiraling again, so Naoto thought of the hospital. The wall outside had been rough against her palms. She'd been threadbare with exhaustion. They'd been there for hours and inside the television hours before that and the voice was always angry and Naoto had been so, _so _sick of lying, so much that something had finally snapped inside her chest, a rubber band pulled too taut. She remembered hating herself for the way her voice had cracked and the words had refused to come - but the boy who she didn't remember had grabbed her hands and then-

Naoto pulled herself up on one leg, then the other. After the hospital came December and she remembered all of it, everything that happened from the moment she'd jumped through the screen to the two boys dragging her back.

Souji Seta. Kanji Tatsumi. The first was here. Naoto hoped that the second wasn't. The optimistic part of her mind thought that perhaps he had the sense to stay outside and keep himself safe, but the rational part knew better - and a desperate, terrified part suspected her dream might prove prophetic, no matter how hard she tried to prevent it.

The red and black road was back under her feet. She started walking.

* * *

"Rise-chan, where are we?" Teddie looked around the mirrored room, nose twitching. "This place doesn't smell like any place I know."

Rise kneaded her knuckles against her temples and winced. "I can't tell. The rest of this world's changing around too much. Kanzeon's getting dizzy."

"Shit, I don't like this," Kanji muttered. "S'damn creepy."

"Well, the mirrors aren't moving." Chie stood in front of one, hands on her hips, and glanced herself up and down. "That's something, right?"

"Yeah. It's a problem." Across the room, Yosuke was running his fingers down the edges of one mirror, trying to gain some purchase on the smooth surface. "If they were moving, we might find a door or something underneath."

No doors on the walls and no holes in the white floor or ceiling. The room was giving Kanji a headache too, all stark lines and sharp edges. Reminded him too much of where they'd found Naoto last year. He swallowed hard and marched over to the nearest mirror. It was about three meters tall, more than enough to fully contain his reflection - but the top seemed to merge with the wall, which made no sense. One was all dull black and white lines and the other was smooth and reflective, and yet even when he stared hard and searched for the edge, the join was seamless. Trick of the eyes, he decided, and took a step closer.

A few meters away, Yukiko stood in front of another, identical mirror. "Don't these look a little strange?"

Chie let out a loud, exaggerated sigh. "C'mon, Yukiko. I keep telling you, you're _not _fat."

"Oh, you _know _that's not what I meant! They're just - odd. I don't know why. Maybe it's-"

Kanji tuned them out, and stared at himself in silence.

He looked clumsy. Too big. Always did - and honestly, he hated it. Scared the other kids away, made him feel like he'd break stuff. He'd never mentioned this to Naoto - she was already hung up about being little - but he'd always worried he'd break her too, if he wasn't careful. Got it into his head she was somehow fragile, deep down. That he needed to look after her.

Look where _that _had got him.

He stretched out a hand and pressed four fingers against the glass. "Stupid," he muttered.

"Yeah. It really is."

Kanji glanced up. His reflection stared back: smirking, yellow-eyed.

He blinked. "The hell are you-"

"Don't worry, man. This is Souji-senpai's place. Amazing guy, right?" The Shadow grinned, a flash of white teeth.

Kanji scowled. "You know where he is?"

"Oh, Senpai's just a _star_!" Its expression twisted into something resembling admiration, except it was all wrong: the eyes, the mouth, everything. "Convinced us it was okay to like making dolls, talked to us 'bout our old man, taught us to just be us - and never once mentioned that deep down we were scared shitless of being a faggot 'cause we got a hard-on for some pretty kid outside school. Never called us out on our bullshit!"

This was _stupid_. Rationally, Kanji knew his Shadow was long gone, meaning this guy had to be a fake – but logic had never come easy. "Shut up! You're a frickin' liar, that ain't how-"

Two cold hands snapped around his jacket collar and the Shadow lunged through the glass. "Souji-senpai knows it's really about boys and girls, Kanji-chan. Not sewin' fucking toys." The next slow breath was ice against his cheek. "And he's told Naoto. Told her you like _real _guys better, that she just doesn't cut it."

The room around him was empty now, leaving just him and the mirror. Kanji jerked up his hands in turn and grabbed the Shadow's wrists. "Hell w'you, you don't even-"

"What? Worried you're gonna lose your fucked-up twink friend?"

"She ain't fucked up!"

"Oh, yeah! Throwin' little kids in televisions is totally normal, right? Just like trying to kill your friends?" The Shadow's lips curled into a sneer. "They stuck her in the nuthouse for four months, Kanji-chan."

"Naoto wanted them to, she said it'd help, she-"

"-said she wanted to be punished. Then she changed her mind and walked out. Right so far?"

"Shut up!" He squeezed the Shadow's wrists tighter.

"You want the truth?" it snarled, eyes blazing. "Poor little _Naoto-kun _hated you from the start, just like she hated the rest of the team. You've been goin' round for months telling yourself that you saved her, saved everyone, just 'cause you stole a couple kisses and followed her around like a damn puppy - but you made no difference. Souji was just better than her an' that's why she lost. Just like he's better than you."

The last part was true, Kanji knew – knew it absolutely, in the core of his being – so what did that mean for the rest?

He shook his head, teeth bared. "Quit bringing Senpai into this, you bastard, he's-"

"Why not? Thass why she's gone after him now. Back to how she was. And even if she wasn't - well, you know Souji-senpai!" the Shadow trilled. "Brave, smart, talks right, acts right. You _know _she'd pick him."

"She fucking _wouldn't_, alright? And she ain't gone back, she's fine now, she's on our side!" Kanji screwed his eyes shut, then tugged hard on the Shadow's wrists and shoved its hands away.

"How can you be certain?" Naoto asked, and his eyes flew open.

She was in front of him, inside the mirror and she looked just like always. Uniform, hat, still so short she had to turn her head up to meet his gaze. And if her eyes didn't look right - if they were cold and glinted amber in the light - Kanji ignored it. "Naoto! You okay?"

Her expression stayed blank. "I'll ask again. How can you be certain I am on your side?"

"Because it's you!"

"Again. How can you be certain?"

Kanji swallowed. There were a dozen reasons, hundreds, he _knew _there were. "Because – because-"

"Exactly. You can't." Her voice was low and quiet. "You're terrified of losing me again, Kanji-kun, when there was never anything to lose."

"Naoto, don't. C'mon." This time, Kanji reached out, grabbing her hands tight - trying and failing to lock their fingers together. Her skin was freezing cold.

"Let go."

"No! You gotta help us, we're gonna get Souji-senpai then we're gonna get out of here and-" His fingers felt like they were burning, but with ice instead of fire. It _hurt_, and the tighter he held her hands the worse it became.

"Let go."

"Naoto, I'm not gonna-"

"_Let go._"

A sudden surge of pain, like his skin and flesh were being frozen through, every drop of water inside crystallizing. Kanji let out a yell, Naoto's wrists falling from his grip as he jerked back his hands, his fingers already curling in on themselves.

He looked down at them to inspect the damage. They were unmarked; not even tinged red.

"Naoto, the hell did you-" he started, then looked up. In the mirror, his reflection stared back at him, both hands cradled against its chest.


	6. Chapter 6

**6.**

Nausea welled up again as Naoto stumbled along the road. It had to be the fog; she remembered feeling this way last year. The world tilted and bent, or perhaps just the road itself, but she didn't dare step off it for fear of losing the path. The air was too still and stagnant, and a sick chill crept over her skin as her vision blurred at the edges, the red and black squares merging into smeared grey. She tried to focus, repeating the same two words under her breath - _find Souji, find Souji_ - but the smudges stretched towards the center. They overlapped, pulled the road and the fog in strange directions - and in an instant she was doubled over, stomach heaving again.

_(She spends hours every night in November in that same position, and the rest dozing fitfully with one cheek pressed against the cool tiles on the bathroom floor. Each night she reaches for her cell, flicks through the menus to Kanji's number - he told her, in a vague and clumsy fashion, to call him when she couldn't sleep - and stares at it, listening to the steady tick of the watch in her pocket.)_

When the world finally stopped twisting, the retching stopped with it. Naoto straightened up. The wide road still stretched ahead, but the squares were gone, replaced with parallel black and white lines bordered by mirrors on both sides. The fog had vanished, replaced with pure empty white.

The landscape inside the television reflected those dwelling within. She knew the lines belonged to her: orderly, binary, crisp. A visual manifestation of how she saw the world, or once had. But the mirrors couldn't be hers, or she would have seen them last year. Logically, this meant they came either from the being who had brought them here or from Souji. As Naoto walked past, she glanced at her reflection and watched it bounce back and forth between the mirrors. It looked hazy and vague, and sometimes vanished completely. If these belonged to Souji, that raised a new question: why his mind would create mirrors, particularly ones which did not reflect correctly.

More significantly, though the voice in the fog had stayed silent since she'd found the road again, Naoto now heard another. It didn't inhabit the fog the way the first had, making her feel like she was breathing in each word. Instead it was quiet, isolated, and definitely coming from the path ahead. Her hand moved to her right hip, ready to draw her gun, but the chain hung loose and she cursed under her breath. She hadn't carried a firearm since arriving back in Inaba. When Kanji had asked why, she'd told him she simply had no use for one - and hadn't mentioned that even if she did, she could no longer trust herself.

As she moved further along the road, she began to hear garbled syllables, occasionally forming fragments of words. None of it could be understood. The voice grew louder still, even though the path remained empty - but its origin had changed. It was not straight ahead of her, Naoto realized, but ahead and to the side.

She took six slow steps forward, barely breathing and listening carefully at each one. On the seventh, she turned towards the mirror on her left - and inside, Souji was crouched on the floor, rocking back and forth on his haunches.

* * *

Kanji stared dumbfounded, waiting for his reflection to talk to him, for the eyes to turn yellow, for Naoto to come back - but there was nothing there except himself.

Shit. He didn't remember his Shadow ever being that cutting. A flaming half-naked guy hitting on every dude in a ten metre radius had been a bitch to deal with at the time, but he'd understood it, had eventually been able to process and live with it. Now, Kanji felt like he'd been sliced up: like a flap of his skin had been cut loose and pulled back and somebody's fingers were digging around inside. Seeing Naoto had only made it worse. He would've tried to convince himself it hadn't been her, if he didn't remember trying that last time all this happened - stumbling through the fog, insisting there was no way Naoto would ever want to fight. Lying to himself, in the end. And even if it _wasn't_ her he'd seen, it didn't change the truth: that you couldn't lose something you'd never had. Maybe she'd been right.

But he'd honestly thought she—

"Shut up! _Shut up!_"

Kanji's head snapped up. To his left, Rise was bent double in front of another mirror, eyes screwed shut and her hands clawing at her head. "Stop lying!" she shrieked. "That isn't why I want to go back, that isn't it!"

He was there in three long strides – she'd already fallen to her knees – and his hands immediately moved over hers in an attempt to pry them away. When he spoke, his throat felt raw and tight. "Rise, it ain't real, it's-"

She shuddered hard, her fingers still digging into her scalp, then suddenly quieted. For a moment, he thought she'd passed out - until her eyes flew open. "K-Kanji-kun, what-she, she was in there!"

Finally, he managed to pull her hands away. "Y'mean Naoto?"

"N-no. My Shadow. She said I-" Rise trailed off and shook her head. "Forget it, I don't wanna think about it."

"You guys okay?"

Kanji turned around, his hands falling away from Rise's. Chie was approaching him with one arm wrapped around Yukiko, who was staring blankly at the floor.

"Yeah," he lied. "We're fine. You?"

Yukiko looked up. "Did - did you see-" she began - then turned her head away. "I-I _knew_ there was something wrong with them."

"No kidding." Yosuke walked shakily across the room, Teddie in tow. "Man, I thought that guy was an asshole the first time, but that - that was..."

Kanji grimaced. "Shadow, right?"

"Yeah, he-"

"No, no!" Teddie cut in, looking almost indignant. "Mine was wrong, it never looked like that. This one was me without my beautiful fur." He shuddered and pressed closer against Yosuke's side. "My real Shadow _looked_ scarier, but this one was much worse. He knew all kinds of things and he kept talking about Sensei."

"Yours too?" Chie asked, eyes wide. "Mine wouldn't shut up about him!"

Yukiko still hadn't looked back. "Same here."

"And it was nothing good, either," muttered Rise. "Kanji-kun, did yours-"

"Yeah."

He didn't mention Naoto. Nobody else had. And in a way, that made it worse - because if they'd all seen her, he could put it down to their imaginations or this room being fucked up or something that wouldn't make his stomach keep trying to scrunch itself into a ball.

Beside him, Yosuke drew a long, deep breath. "Okay. So we don't touch the mirrors, ever. But we still need to find a way out, guys, this place is seriously creeping me out."

Kanji glanced around the walls. He could see all six of them over and over, images bouncing mirror to mirror, reflections of reflections. Doppelgangers.

...Maybe they could solve two problems in one go.

He grinned. "No worries. I got an idea."

* * *

"Senpai?"

No response. Souji was silently rocking back and forth inside the mirror, arms wrapped around his knees.

Tentatively, Naoto pressed a hand against the glass. The surface dipped and rippled below her fingertips and an odd, familiar shiver crept over her skin. She immediately thought of last July, and the first time she'd touched the television screen. It occurred to her then that she could no longer see her own reflection - only Souji, and the wall of mirrors behind her.

"I know you."

She looked down, automatically taking a step back. Souji stared up at her in turn, eyes narrowed and feverish. "I know you," he hissed again. "But not well enough. Not enough to-" His head dropped again, and he winced.

None of this made sense. "Senpai, if I can pass through the surface, so can you. Please get up, we need to leave."

"No point."

With a small grunt of frustration, Naoto leaned forward through the glass and clasped one hand firmly over Souji's shoulder. He jerked back, smacking her hand away hard enough to sting the skin.

"Stop it! Go alone, I don't need you. All of you, useless. Pathetic." He choked, seemingly on the air, and shot her a baleful glare - eyes flashing yellow almost too quick for Naoto to catch. "And you - you're a traitor. A rival."

She grit her teeth. "One you already defeated. Get up, Senpai."

"No time for traitors, Naoto-chan," he trilled, voice sing-song.

He was too heavy for her to lift alone - Naoto swallowed the sudden, irrational burst of self-disgust - so the best she could do was coax

him to his feet. "Senpai, we have to find a way out."

"Isn't one," Souji spat. "I made this place."

"Not completely. We are both here, remember? My mind played a role in this world's construction." She swallowed. "And – Kanji-kun and the others must be here by now. I am certain they're trying to-"

"I know their secrets. They can't win. No point trying."

Naoto shook her head. "Ridiculous. You were always the one who said-"

"There's no point!"

Desperate, she grabbed Souji hard by the shoulders, fingers pressing lines against his jacket. "Senpai, you are stronger than this! You challenged me last time, remember? If I can fight this, _you_ can win."

Souji sneered, a flash of white teeth and a twist of his lips. "You're nothing compared to me."

"Exactly," Naoto said, ignoring the raw stab of jealousy through her gut. Then she grabbed his hands - bigger than hers, of course, and her mind flickered with the memory of those even larger - and yanked him towards her with all her strength. Souji, caught unawares, jolted forward, fell through the mirror, and hit the floor hard.

"N-Naoto, I..." His voice was suddenly weak. She could hear air wheeze with every breath and her own chest ached in turn, as if her ribs were caving in. The fog. It had to be. Their time was rapidly running out.

She dropped to her knees. "Souji. Get up."

"I-I don't understand, I don't-"

"I know. Stop thinking, remember? _Please_, get up."

Souji stared at her, panicked and hollow-eyed. "Things in the mirrors, parts of me but parts of them. The others relied on me too much, they…"

He should have encountered his Shadow by now. Last year, she'd been attacked by hers moments after first jumping inside the television. This world reshaped itself immediately and drew out a person's core - even if, in her case, so much of it had been masked. Souji had only mirrors. Naoto was beginning to understand why.

"Senpai, I will help you. I promise. But I cannot do this alone - and I will _not _leave you here."

He was still staring at her, eyes wide and unfocused, as if he couldn't see her, the stark lines of the path, or his own mirrors lining the walls – but he still nodded.

_Fixing the past,_ Naoto reminded herself, as she slipped her arm round his chest and helped his climb to his feet - and pointedly ignored the sudden, dizzying sense of power. She owed this to him.

His weight almost pulled her back down. Souji attempted to steady himself, but he was still thirty kilos heavier than her, and largely draped over her narrow shoulders. Steeling herself, Naoto began to slowly move forward, his footsteps falling unsteady alongside her own. She breathed, he breathed, and it all sounded desperate, painful, chilling.

* * *

"We smash 'em."

Chie blinked. "What?"

"Smash them," Kanji repeated. "These mirrors ain't on the walls, they _are_ the walls."

"Kanji-kun, are you sure that's safe?" Yukiko glanced at one of the mirrors to her left, her reflection turning its head and catching her eye in turn.

"Safer than waiting for those bastards to come back." His fake Shadow had been terrifying, far more than the original, because it hadn't just known one thing. It'd known _all_ of it.

...Just like Souji had.

"Kanji's right. These aren't our Shadows." Teddie's nose twitched. "They don't smell right, and the things they say are wrong, too."

"Yeah. Definitely." Yosuke shook his head. "Souji wouldn't-" The sentence ended in a grunt.

Kanji held out his hand, took a shallow breath - and the Emperor card appeared in a puff of blue smoke. "So what are we waiting for?" he said, then crushed it in his hand. "_Rokuten Maoh!_"

He felt rather than saw Rokuten Maoh appear behind him, but the rush was the same as always: electricity up his spine, thunder rolling through his veins. A bolt of lightning smashed against the mirror, sparks bouncing off as the glass cracked clean down the middle. Grey fog seeped through the gap.

"Could've just kicked them," he heard Chie say, sounding a little disappointed, but the end of it was lost in a roar of flame. Amaterasu curled around Yukiko, her wings forming a cocoon, and four mirrored panels melted outright with five more buckling under the heat. Kanji called a second bolt, smashing another two mirrors, till half of the wall ahead was gone.

Yosuke's face had broken into a wide grin, and he was tossing and flipping a knife with one hand. "Probably enough, right?"

"Seven years bad luck," Rise said with a smirk. "And that's for each mirror!"

Kanji shrugged. "Eh, we'll live."

The mirror shards had already vanished, sunken in the fog outside of the room. It was still too thick for their glasses to penetrate - but at the edge, barely visible, were the first few black and red squares of a road.

* * *

Suddenly, Souji dropped to his knees, dragging Naoto with him, and _screamed_.

It was a raw and terrible sound, made her head throb - and in the same instant, the mirrors lining the path shattered.

The shards rained down over them in a cacophony of breaking glass. Naoto tried desperately to shield Souji - because he still hadn't stopped screaming - but she couldn't cover him completely, and the sharp stabs of pain in her back left her gritting her teeth, her fingers snarled reflexively around the fabric of his jacket.

Then, for a single moment, time stood still, and she was aware of everything: the crash of the mirrors breaking, the shards still hanging in the air, the choking sensation of fog coagulating in her throat. The way Souji's knuckles had whitened as his nails dug jagged crescents in his scalp. And most of all, the woman standing - no, _floating _- ahead of them, above the path that was slowly fading back into the fog.

The woman's face was perfectly impassive, perfectly still, perfect. Naoto's heart hammered so hard against her ribs that she expected them to crack.

_"Why do you still run?"_ the woman asked.

Souji, now silent, began to shudder, and Naoto tightened her grip.

"Let us leave," she told the woman. "We have no quarrel with you."

Even as she spoke, some part of her knew it to be a lie, if an inadvertent one. There was something horribly familiar about this woman; something that made Naoto think of fever dreams and sleepless nights and fingernails splintered from clawing at walls.

_"Give me the boy."_

Beside her, Souji shook harder. She felt a cold shiver creep up her spine, slip down her arms to the tips of her fingers, then creep over her chest, her jaw, her throat and teeth. Her grip began to loosen.

_Stop it_, she tried to snarl, but her tongue stuck to her teeth, leaving only a weak hiss of air.

Souji turned his head to look down at her and his eyes were _wrong_.

_"You have failed me once,"_ the woman said. _"You will not do so again. Give me the boy."_

Naoto tried to shake her head - both as a response, and a way to fight the sudden urge to push Souji forward, pick up a mirror shard and sever the veins and arteries in his neck. Slice through the carotid and the jugular and the blood would drain from the head in moments. Death would be rapid, if not instantaneous. Naoto had seen the results before; Inaba was far from her first murder case.

If she killed Souji, the woman could not have him. If she killed Souji, the woman would choose her.

Naoto leaned down, Souji still slumped by her side, and picked up a shard from the flickering path.

The woman's lips twisted into something mimicking a smile. _"Attempting to prove yourself?"_

It would be simple. Naoto watched the shard press against Souji's throat and the first spots of blood prickle over his skin.

Simple.

Then came a flash, a memory from last year - Souji and Kanji, lifting her from the floor and pulling her back through the fog - and Naoto's hand snapped around the shard, sharp edges slicing into her palm.

"H-He isn't yours," she spat at the woman, throwing the bloody shard aside.

_"He is, as are you. Two elements of the trinity: despair, emptiness, hope. The boy is the last and most crucial."_

_Then which one am I,_ Naoto briefly wondered, though the answer seemed cruelly obvious.

Suddenly, Souji lurched away from her side. The shift in weight almost knocked her to the floor and her hands automatically latched onto the hem of his jacket, but he easily broke away. He stumbled forward, slow and unsteady, toward the woman.

The cold shiver passed again, and Naoto's legs refused to move.

_Stop,_ she tried to tell him, _stop, you aren't supposed to be like me, you're better, you're—_

The woman stretched her arms down, cupping and stroking Souji's face with two porcelain white hands. Unable to see his expression, Naoto could only rely on body language: limp and too relaxed, like half his bones were missing. When he turned to face her, his eyes glowed yellow.

She tried to turn and run - hating herself for the choice - but her limbs still refused to cooperate. As the woman moved closer, every muscle in Naoto's body solidified, so sudden and so rigid she thought she might shatter like the mirrors. Frozen still, she was suddenly aware of the exhaustion creeping through her, the sharp burning pain in her hand and over her back, the way her lungs seemed clotted with fog.

Souji was lost. Kanji was nowhere to be seen. For the first time in months, she heard another voice at the back of her head: both a man and a beast, who roared when the woman caressed Naoto's face, neck and jaw. _Fight her!_ he snarled - but the woman's lips were already on hers, cold and smooth as ice.

Something wrenched inside her and tore loose, rushing through Naoto's chest and throat and mouth. _Izanagi_, the woman whispered, and the world blazed white.


	7. Chapter 7

**7.**

Souji sat opposite her at the Dojimas' kitchen table, sipping from a can of TaP soda. Naoto had never liked the flavour. "So, any more letters?"

The latest envelope lay in her lap. This one had arrived at her apartment today; Naoto was mildly concerned that the sender knew her address, but the team was certain to assist her should anything transpire, Souji in particular. She had proven her worth in rescuing Nanako – all the while wondering how Namatame had ever been able to bring himself to throw a child inside - and still made regular visits to the hospital.

After all, Senpai needed her support.

"Just one." She placed the envelope on the table. "But the paper is blank. I assume it represents some sort of message, but I am uncertain how to interpret it."

He hummed in thought. "Can I see it?" he asked, and when Naoto handed it over, he stood and walked to the stove. After turning it on, he held the letter over the burner – and soon, faint text appeared on the paper.

Invisible ink. Such a simple, childish trick; a clue hidden in plain sight. Naoto would have scolded herself for not realizing sooner, but after several years of challenging and complicated cases, simplicity was one of the few things still able to surprise her.

Nonetheless, her disappointment must have shown. Senpai smiled at her, gentle and fond. "Don't feel bad, Naoto. You can't catch everything."

But she _should_. That was her job, Naoto thought, the only way she could ever be accept-

"That's why I'm here," Souji added – and now his palm was cupping her cheek, fingertips feather light against her skin. Everything seemed to stop: the drip of the kitchen tap, the specks of dust in the air, the ticking of the clock on the wall.

Did she feel like this every time he touched her? The data points were too few in number to fit the curve, too sparse to test any hypothesis – but Naoto had the sinking, dizzying sensation that something wasn't right, and that Senpai knew it.

Meaning there was no need to worry. Senpai would take care of everything.

He dropped one hand from her face and lifted the paper with the other. "See, the message is clear now. You should read it." He handed it to her, and Naoto peered closely at the handwritten text.

* * *

"Hey...you guys feel that?"

Yosuke glanced over, frowning. "Feel what?"

Kanji couldn't name the feeling; it came from his gut, not his head. "I dunno. Like everything shifted, like it-" But he had no idea where the sentence was going and ended it with a frustrated grunt. Souji and Naoto had always been the ones with the gift for words.

"Kanji-kun might be right." Rise pressed her fingertips against her temples. "Something feels off, but I can't tell what."

Beside her, Chie let out a groan. "Jeez...I used to think all that corridors and stairs stuff sucked, but this is even worse! We're walking blind here."

"We've got the road." Yosuke gestured ahead. "And I think the fog might be thinning." He sighed. "Which might not be a _good_ thing, but at least it means we're going somewhere."

The lack of fog should've brought more light, but instead it was steadily dimming. Based on the way Yukiko had started shivering and tugging her cardigan round her - she'd always been real bad with the cold - it was getting chillier too. Kanji would've offered her his jacket, but Chie soon shrugged off her own and wrapped it around Yukiko's shoulders.

As the team walked, the road became wider and flatter, and marble columns began to appear at the edges. They curved into open arcs over Kanji's head, like a set of ribs. The fact that he could see them - and now see _past_ them, into an inky blackness that gave him the sensation of falling through empty space - meant the fog had almost completely cleared. The same darkness surrounded the road, too, as if it was stretching through thin air.

Teddie glanced from one side of the road to the other, then at the arches above. "Oh, I don't like this," he whimpered. "This isn't normal at all."

Yukiko ran a palm gently over his head. "Why? There wasn't much fog in our places, either."

"But this is _outside_, Yuki-chan. There are no walls in this place. There should be fog everywhere."

"I think that's why Kanzeon can't map it," Rise said. "Everything keeps changing, like this place wasn't finished before we got here."

Yosuke shook his head. "But they're _always_ complete. These worlds form straight away, right? Soon as someone gets put inside the TV."

"Yeah. So I think it means something. Naoto-kun's was falling apart - but this one, it's like it was never finished."

Kanji didn't know how to interpret that. Could mean neither Souji nor Naoto had enough left in them to build anything, or that whoever had brought them here was in charge of how it all looked. Maybe both. And neither of those options were good. Everyone else had fallen quiet, meaning they'd probably already reached the same conclusion; he'd never been the quickest thinker in the group.

Above them, the sky stretched dark and silent, all traces of fog vanished. Even Kanji's breathing sounded loud, almost as much as his own heartbeat thudding in his ears.

"Wait. There's something up ahead." Rise stopped, and shuddered. "No, _someone_."

Yosuke leapt on that. Big surprise. "You mean Souji?"

"No, no, somebody else. And there's two of them. I – I think I know them both, but..."

In the dimming light, the tiles beneath their feet now seemed to emit a faint glow, yet the rest of the road was cast in darkness. Squinting, Kanji could see two dim figures standing ahead: one about Yosuke's height, the other a little taller, but the lack of light made it impossible to make out any other features.

"Um...should we stop?" Chie asked, tone uncertain.

Though she was ahead of him and wouldn't see it, he still fiercely shook his head. "No way. We ain't stopping till we've got Naoto and Souji-senpai."

"Or one of them," Yosuke muttered.

Kanji had seen enough now to know that Naoto wasn't the only one driving this place. Hanamura was deluded, and what made it even worse was that Kanji must have sounded exactly the same way last December: frightened, frustrated, and unwilling to admit what everyone else already knew.

The team slowly walked closer and closer to the figures, who gradually grew more distinct in the darkness – but it wasn't until they were a few meters away, and the tiles finally lit up, that Kanji recognized them both.

"Well, well," Tohru Adachi sneered – blood pouring from a wound on his head, soaking through his suit, spilling onto the road. "Never expected a bunch of brats to get this far."

Namatame stood at his side, eyes wide; his expression an unnerving mix of fear and despair. Just like he'd been in the hospital last year, when they'd almost thrown him—

"I remember you." Namatame's voice trembled. "You all said you'd find the true culprit - and it was one of you all along."

They'd never gone back to him, never explained the whole story – partly because they hadn't understood it, but mostly because the wound had been too raw. It wasn't until late January that they'd managed to even get together for a meeting and make a few vague references to what had happened. Maybe Namatame had heard from someone else, maybe this version of him was pulled from Naoto's or Souji's head – but he still had it all wrong. "It wasn't just Naoto!" Kanji snapped.

"She didn't kill the first two victims," Yosuke said, so quiet and unexpected that Kanji wondered if he'd misheard. "Souji said so."

"Nope, she didn't." Adachi's face distorted into a too-wide grin, blood trickling from his lips. "Guess who did."

"We already know, bastard," Yosuke spat back. "You murdered Saki-senpai, then karma bit you in the ass."

The grin vanished. Adachi's mouth curled into a snarl instead, his expression darkening. "She _let_ it happen. She chose me then left me to die, the backstabbing bitch. Then Shirogane took my place and fucked it all up."

Kanji kept his eyes on Adachi, but he could hear the confusion in Chie's voice. "'She'?"

"I would've done it, y'know," Adachi continued. "I would've won. But Shirogane wasn't empty when She started." He turned to Kanji and the sneer had crept back onto his face. "That's where _you_ came in. Man, Shirogane must have seriously lousy taste."

Naoto hadn't created this guy. Even though everything that'd happened between her and Kanji was over, she'd never, _ever_ think like this, and that was why he clenched his fists and growled out, "Fuck you."

He'd dimly registered that Namatame had been silent all this time, staring blankly at Adachi – but it wasn't until he finally spoke that Kanji realized why. "...You killed Mayumi?"

Adachi shrugged - a limp, absent roll of his shoulders. "Accident. I just wanted to teach that bitch a lesson for screwing you. A gold-digging home-wrecker - who'd miss her?"

"You – you—"

"Ah, ah." He waved a finger, grinning wide, showing his bloodied teeth. "We're supposed to work together, remember? Two of the triumvirate."

The trium-what?

"I won't forget. When we're done. I'll—" Namatame lurched toward Adachi, every muscle tensed. "I'll—"

"Whatever. Let's get this over with."

Rise took a step backward. "Guys, I don't like this..."

"Work together on what?" Yukiko asked, cautiously.

"Getting rid of you." Adachi arched his back – eyes glowing yellow, fingertips digging into his scalp – and Izanagi flashed above him. But it was a _different_ Izanagi, not like Souji's or Naoto's: blood red head to foot, a gaping wound on its head, stance echoing its owner's. The air around it rippled with power. Beside him, Namatame mimicked the same motion, and yet another Izanagi burst into being – this one cast in a single shade of dull grey, with no trace of colour. Its arms hung oddly in the air, as if held up by invisible strings.

What was the connection? Why did Souji, Naoto, and these two all share the same Persona? Namatame shouldn't even _have_ one; he'd been his own Shadow, had never been forced to accept who and what he really was.

"Look, just get out of our way, okay?" Chie was saying, though Kanji had partially tuned out. "We're not here to fight with either of you."

At her side, Yosuke had shifted into battle stance. "Speak for yourself. That bastard killed Saki-senpai, and we're the only ones who'll ever know!"

"Adachi's dead." Yukiko's voice was quiet, almost resigned. "I think that's punishment enough."

Adachi laughed, high-pitched and hysterical. "Well, isn't that _generous_ of you!" The smile faded an instant later. "But you know what? You can _stick_ your compassion. _Magatsu Izanagi!_"

Kanji barely glimpsed the crimson Persona lifting one fist before the lightning bolt crashed into the centre of the group. Yosuke and Ted both cried out in pain, Chie was nearly knocked off the road into the dark, and Yukiko - Yukiko was still on her feet, Amaterasu shimmering behind her. The Persona's wings flapped once and streams of fire seared through the air and slammed into Adachi's Persona. It barely flinched.

The electricity hadn't touched Kanji. He evoked almost without thinking, crushing his card and sending Rokuten Maoh roaring into life. The Persona raised his sword high, brought it down hard toward Magatsu Izanagi - but before he'd even finished the swing, he was thrown backward by a blast of wind, Kanji flying back with him. Namatame's Izanagi had finally woken.

"_Guys!_" Rise called through Kanzeon. "_Magatsu Izanagi has fire and electricity, the other one wind and ice. Keep Teddie and Yukiko-senpai safe!_"

Easier said than done. Kanji picked himself up, ignoring the metallic taste in his mouth, and evoked again - this time sending a lightning bolt steaking into Namatame's Izanagi. Chie was back on her feet too, and above her, Suzuka Gongen twirled her naginata and shot a flurry of ice shards straight at Magatsu Izanagi. Persona and owner both shrieked, high-pitched and painful. Magatsu-Izanagi vanished, Adachi fell to his knees, and Yosuke started forward - but he didn't evoke.

"Namatame-san!" he shouted. "Why are you attacking us?"

Namatame hesitated, his Izanagi flickering behind him. "I - I have to. She said so. She - doesn't want you here."

_She_. Adachi had said the same thing, but who were they talking about?

"Forget about her! What do _you_ want?" Yosuke glanced at Adachi, the latter still on his knees. "Who killed Mayumi Yamano?"

"I-"

"I promised I'd avenge Saki-senpai," Yosuke said, softer now, voice cracking on the final words. "What did you promise Mayumi?"

Namatame opened his mouth, then closed it again. His eyes were fixed on Yosuke, wider than ever, but they looked strange; like he was seeing straight through.

"Nice...try, kid." The words were a hissed snarl, almost too quiet to hear. Adachi pulled himself upright, slow and heavy, and Magatsu Izanagi rematerialized. "Maybe you need a lesson in-"

He didn't have time to finish before Namatame's Izanagi lunged forward and speared its naginata through Adachi's own. Magatsu Izanagi staggered under the blow, tried to counter with an upward spike, but fell back further under a flurry of blows. Beneath them, Namatame slowly walked toward Adachi, the latter clutching his stomach and stumbling back in turn. He was at the edge of the road in moments, his Persona almost lost in static.

Namatame glanced toward the group. "Go. Quickly, if you want to save your friends." He glanced at Adachi. "And remember, they're the same as us."

None of them bothered to check with the others first. They all just broke into a run, dashing past both men over the red and black tiles. As they bolted along the road, the tiles glowed only where they moved, and Namatame and Adachi rapidly vanished into the darkness - but Adachi's final, terrifying scream still pierced it straight through.

* * *

_This isn't what happened._

Naoto blinked at the paper. She looked up; Souji was smiling, smiling, always smiling, and he nodded at her to keep reading.

_History repeats. You betrayed them and you will do so again, because you have no way to resist. _

Her mouth was dry, ash on her tongue, and she would've walked to the sink to drink but her legs refused to move. The wall was shifting behind Souji – undulating, the photo frames moving with it – and a voice echoed from…somewhere. Upstairs? They were alone in the house (Senpai liked it that way) with none of the team due to visit (Naoto had checked) so the sound made no sense.

It didn't help that the voice was so familiar. Or that it had started to read the text aloud.

_And you will outlast them all, because emptiness endures._

If Souji had heard it, he said nothing. His smile grew wide, wider, too many teeth and razor-sharp.

"It's always been the same, no matter where I go," he said. "I've never known who or what I was, so I try to be everything. All things to all people." He chuckled, shaking his head. "And it works. They all fall for it. They all _need_ me. But only She could show me what I really am." He stared at Naoto, yellow eyes wide and hollow. "She'll show you too, if you just let go."

The walls were all rippling now, the floor too. Panicked, Naoto tried to orientate herself. She was in the Dojimas' house, there was thick fog outside, she could see it through the kitchen window – but for a single inexplicable instant Kanji was out there too. She blinked, trying to clear her vision, and the walls faded into the murky grey.

_Humans are empty. Humans do not hope._

"I know the others," Souji told her. "I shaped them. But you – I don't know you. There wasn't time. That's why you have to obey her." He wagged a finger. "Don't forget that, Naoto-kun."

The world twirled and tipped at right-angles. Naoto squeezed her eyes shut in an attempt to fight off the nausea, but everything just kept spinning - until after what felt like minutes, hours, days, it finally ground to a halt.

She opened her eyes.

She was standing on a platform. Empty space on three sides. The silver-haired boy was beside her. There was an itch inside her head, one that made her want to pry open her skull and dig around till she found the source, but there were no tools here to do so. They could be found somewhere in here – green light, a table, drills above her head – but she had forgotten where. She'd forgotten so many things: how she got here, who the boy was, her name.

_Stop thinking_, the itch told her, and none of it seemed to matter.

* * *

They ran for as long as they could, only slowing when Rise and Teddie both began to tire. Kanji briefly debated picking either one up and just carrying them, if it meant getting to Naoto sooner, until he remembered they had no idea what they'd be running into. He settled for a half-jog instead. The others were panting snatches of conversation around him, but it was nothing more than white noise.

_Save your friends_. What did Naoto and Souji need rescuing from? Kanji had the chilling, sickening feeling he knew the answer - and you could only save someone who wanted to be saved.

"Up ahead, everyone," Rise called, cutting through his thoughts. She'd dismissed Kanzeon after the fight with Adachi - couldn't run with her visor on - but as usual, some of the Persona's scanning power carried over to her. "There's - a doorway...but I can't tell where it goes."

Kanji focused on the darkness in front of him. Twenty meters or so further, the road stopped abruptly at a red wall, with a door set in the center. Inside, barely visible from where he was standing, was a wide set of steps.

Even from a few feet back, Kanji noticed Chie's fingers twist nervously in the pockets of her jacket. "Oh. I guess we go there, huh?"

The wall itself was perfectly smooth. Under Kanji's fingertips, it felt like marble. He traced his fingers along the surface till they reached the door, then squinted at the steps inside. "Y'know where these lead, Rise?"

Behind him, Rise was still winded, her hands on her knees. "Nope...Kanzeon can't tell...anything about this place, Kanji-kun. I'm pretty much useless."

That isn't true, Rise-chan," Teddie said, with a firm shake of his fuzzy head. "You're still bear-y useful in a fight."

Rise winced. "I'm kinda hoping we can _avoid _any more of those, Teddie."

"I'm more worried about what the hell Namatame meant," Yosuke said. "How are Souji and Naoto like him and Adachi?"

Yukiko frowned, lips pursed. "Adachi mentioned a triumvirate - but that's three people. Him, Namatame, Souji and Naoto-kun make four."

"Well, Adachi's dead," Chie said with a shrug. "I don't see how he could be part of anything."

Shit, were they just gonna stand around and talk their way to the end of the world? Naoto was probably waiting for them, Souji too. Whether that was good or bad, Kanji wasn't certain. "We can talk 'bout that crap later. Are we goin' up or what?"

Rise placed one hand on his back and peered around his left side, at the steps heading up into the dark. "Are you sure about this, Kanji-kun?"

"Yeah," he said. "I'll lead."

When he turned back to the team, Yosuke's eyes had narrowed. "You? Dude, you always bring up the back. Why're you-" Then he stopped, and grimaced. "Look, if Naoto's there- "

"Got nothing to do with it," Kanji lied. "I'm the tank and Rise can't tell us what's up ahead anymore. So I'll go first." He turned and stepped through the door without waiting for an answer. Inside, it was almost pitch black and the wide staircase quickly receded into darkness.

"You know, I could go last instead," Chie said.

Behind him, he heard Yosuke's short, frustrated rush of breath. "Ugh, _fine_. I'll do it."

They filed through the door and toward the stairs. In the darkness, they automatically fell into a chain, each person gripping the hand of another for fear of one of them stumbling or being left behind.

"Man, this is creepy," Chie muttered in the black.

Kanji didn't need to see Rise to hear the smirk in her voice. "Hey, you wanted stairs." The only response was Chie's sigh.

Slowly, they climbed higher and higher. With his long legs, it was natural for him to stride up several steps at once - but Yukiko was clutching his hand, so he reined it in. He remembered doing the same with Naoto, even though she always noticed and insisted she was perfectly capable of keeping up.

"There's something at the top, guys. I don't know what - but it's familiar." Rise's voice was little more than a whisper. "Everyone be careful, okay?"

They kept moving, still holding hands, and above them Kanji saw the first hint of light reflecting off the edges of the steps. It grew brighter the higher they moved and soon the stairs stopped appearing altogether.

"We're near the top," he said, not turning round. "We need to-"

"Hey! Can anyone hear me?"

Far behind him, Kanji heard a sharp intake of breath.

"Souji?" Yosuke said - then lurched forward, shoving his way up the steps and breaking the chain. "Hey, Souji! You there?"

"Wait, wait!" hissed Rise. "This isn't safe, Yosuke-senpai, wait-!"

But he was already gone, taking the stairs two at the time. "Souji! We're on our way, partner, hold tight!"

The chain scattered completely. Chie started yelling at Yosuke and racing after him; Yukiko was still holding Kanji's hand but starting to move after Chie; Rise was somewhere at the back with Teddie, trying to help him up the steps. And Yosuke, he was already at the top - and he'd stopped yelling.

Fuck it. Kanji took a deep breath, let go of Yukiko's hand with a whispered apology, then ran up the steps in long, quick strides. He hit the final step seconds later, saw Yosuke standing with his blades hanging at his sides, opened his mouth to tell Hanamura what a damn _idiot_ he'd been - but it all stopped dead when he looked ahead. Five meters in front across the open platform stood Souji and Naoto: side by side, eyes glowing yellow.

* * *

Two figures at the top of the stairs. Different-shaped silhouettes. They twisted and turned and one was large and the other held something sharp and shining.

Souji, the sharp one called from somewhere underwater, I knew you were here, Souji, are you okay?

They ought to have faces if they were able to talk. And she thought she remembered that they _did_ - but a sudden throb of pain pulsed through her skull, as something - someone? - snatched the memory away.

Four more soon joined the two. All smaller. They didn't speak, though she heard a few quiet gasps.

The large one was familiar; something about the way it stood and moved. Something about the way it turned toward her and called out, Naoto, Naoto, we came to get you, we -

Naoto. Wasn't that-

She blinked, and the memory was gone.

* * *

He'd seen this before: cold expressions, yellow eyes. December - which Kanji had spent months trying to bury - rushed up behind him all at once.

"Hey, guys," Souji said softly. Naoto stood beside him, blank and silent.

"Souji, are you-" Yosuke took one step forward, then stopped short along with the sentence. He'd finally noticed the eyes.

"What's wrong, Yosuke?" Souji's lips curved into a smirk, and he tipped his head towards Naoto. "Did you think the Detective Prince kidnapped me?"

Yosuke glanced from Souji to Naoto then back again. His hands were shaking. "She - she did this to you? She brought you here?"

"No." The smirk shifted into a scowl. "As if she _could_."

Chie reached forward, one hand grabbing Yosuke's arm and tugging him back. "Then who did? What happened, Souji?"

"I learned the truth. Why there's no point in fighting the fog. Why I'm worth more than any of you." The scowl vanished. "And why you won't win."

"Senpai, we don't have to fight." Rise was clearly trying to sound calm and strong, but she couldn't hide the shake in her voice. "Let's just go home, we can find the way out together."

"Of course. Souji-senpai can do everything, right? He's amazing." Souji's gaze glided over each of them in turn and his eyes glowed brighter. "I'm _sick_ of it. Sick of dealing with your petty little problems, sick of fixing your mistakes."

"You don't mean that, Sensei!"

"'Cept you do, don't you?" Kanji asked, though it wasn't a question.

He'd had time to think about this stuff. Plenty of it. Whatever had happened to Naoto that had first made her able to enter the television had screwed her up bad, ripped up all the anger and hurt she'd been swallowing and magnified it. It made sense that the same thing had happened to Souji. Maybe he'd hidden it all better and for longer, but the end was the same.

Souji nodded. "I have to be what people want. I have to be _needed_. It's the only way I can be anything at all - and it's how I know all of you inside to out. But I can't stand it."

"Souji-kun - was it that person I saw?" Yukiko asked. "The person you and Naoto-kun were talking to at the gas station? Did they bring you here?"

"Yes. She showed me a lot. Explained everything." Strange shadows passed across his face, dark shapes the dim light couldn't possibly cast. "What I am, where I fit, what I have to do."

He raised one arm, Naoto mimicking the same action - and in two flashes of light, a sword appeared in each of their hands. The metal glowed with a faint blue tinge that reminded Kanji of summoning Rokuten Maoh, that split-second the Emperor card appeared in his hands.

_Shit._ "Watch out, he's gonna-"

Near-frantic now, Yosuke gestured wide with one knife. "Souji! You can't - come on, partner, it's us! We can leave, just put-"

"No. She already has me, Yosuke. This ends the same way as last year, just like with Naoto." Souji lifted his sword and ran one finger of his other hand along the flat of the blade. "Except I'll win."

At the mention of her name, Kanji swore Naoto's expression flickered - and maybe he was imagining it, but the sword in her hands seemed to tremble.

"Naoto, c'mon!" he yelled. "Listen to me!" Souji was gone, but Naoto, maybe she was still-

Souji's expression was utterly blank. "I've told you. She already has us." He pointed to his chest. "Just a vessel. Adachi and Namatame, too. And Naoto, even if there wasn't time to fully hollow her out. We try to fill ourselves with delusions, obsessions, other people's emotions - but we're all just waiting for _her_."

Kanji looked at Naoto again, met her gaze - _come on, Naoto, you remember, snap out of it!_ - but she turned her head away an instant later.

He swallowed. "Dammit, Senpai, you're better than this. Don't-"

"Enough talking." Black clouds had begun to swirl around his calves, and Naoto's too, swathing the two of them in darkness. "You're all worthless without me - and before, I'd have been nothing without you. But with Izanami, I'm complete."

There was a sudden sharp crack - not glass, more like the ground ripping open - and a ripple in the dark above them just before the roar of the wind. It was almost a gale this time, forcing Kanji to shield his eyes just after he saw the first flash of a blue light. Moments later, the light and the noise died away, leaving only a hum of energy in the air - and he could taste the fog in his mouth again.

Kanji dropped his hand. Two Izanagis hovered in the air: Souji's, darker and larger than before, and Naoto's, no longer only black and white but still chained and blindfolded. Mirrors now lined every side of the platform, blocking the stairs behind him. The team stood reflected, multiplied and bouncing off mirrors opposite. An instant later, their doppelgangers shifted, became crude silhouettes with their hands pressed against the surfaces.

In the center of the platform, Souji raised his sword, his eyes still glowing - and the first shadows stepped through the glass.

* * *

The creature floating behind confused her, because she didn't know why it was there.

_You called us._

That wasn't possible. She would remember, like she remembered watching the figures, hearing them talk as if underwater, then seeing more step out from the mirrors that had shimmered into existence with the first rush of wind.

_You called us, Naoto._

A spike of pain speared through her head. In front of her, the figures were scattering, the six she saw originally disappearing among those from the mirrors.

_Why do you need us? Why did you call?_

She couldn't remember. Every time she tried, the thought vanished from her mind. As if someone had sliced open her brain, reached inside and plucked it out between their fingers. But this creature should know the answer, surely?

_We do not. We understand what she did, the part of you she wrenched free and filled with herself. But why did you call us?_

The sound was different now, as if two voices were speaking in unison. Ahead, other creatures shivered in and out of being as the silhouettes battled each other in a cacophony of roaring flame, thunder and metal-on-metal. The boy next to her stood and watched, his own creature occasionally arching and firing out blasts of energy.

_Naoto._

Again, the word sparked a burst of pain. Her hands gripped the sword hilt more tightly and the sensation triggered an image. Her and the silver-haired boy next to her. A taller boy, speared clean through with the blade, blood flowing over the metal and pooling on the floor.

She shuddered. That _wouldn't_ happen, she would never-

_Naoto._

The shadows were a writhing mass of black as a third spike drove through her head - but some of them seemed _familiar_ now, color flickering over their featureless faces.

One of them, she realized, looked more familiar than the rest.

_What do you intend to do, Naoto?_

She didn't tell her hands to raise the sword, or her legs to push her into motion. The instructions came from somewhere inside, a place she couldn't reach - and by the time the final spike hit and she remembered what the word meant, Naoto was already running across the room.


	8. Chapter 8

**8.**

Kanji had never given up on anything - not himself, not a fight, not Naoto - but he suspected this might just be a lost cause.

His head was pounding, his heart ricocheting off his ribs and no matter how of these damn shadows he knocked down, they just kept getting back up. In the corner of the platform, Chie was kicking and swiping, trying to keep them off Rise - but a corner was no safer when mirrors lined every wall. Yukiko and Teddie had tried slinging fire and ice to smash them, while Yosuke took the brunt of the shadow attacks, but this time the magic hadn't left a scratch. Kanji would've paused to wonder why, if a dark figure hadn't leapt through the nearest mirror, arms stretched out for his throat.

He lashed out with his steel plate and slammed the shadow to the floor. The back of its head caved clean in, black goo splashing over the tiles - but it'd be up again in moments, and another was already clawing at his back. He pivoted, fist drawn back – and in the moment before he smashed the shadow in the face, knocking it down, he realized it was a silhouette of _him_. Scanning the room, he could see that the figures going after Rise looked like her, Chie had just kneed her own doppelganger in the chin, and the shadows that Yosuke was fighting were a jumble of him and Yukiko and Teddie.

Kanji glanced at Naoto. Still wasn't moving. Her Izanagi hovered silent in the air behind her. Souji's Izanagi was nearby, now dripping some sort of black gunk, something that looked too much like whatever had come out of that shadow's head. But the goo was suddenly _glowing_, deep blood red, and Kanji dove to the floor on instant. The shards of ice shot straight past him, half of them hitting Yosuke and the rest slamming into Yukiko. Amaterasu took the worst of it, but she still hit the deck hard, and at the sound of her scream, Chie cried out from across the room too, knee-deep in shadows herself.

...Souji knew the team's weaknesses. He'd spent a year building strategies to protect against them. And even if Rokuten Maoh didn't fear the wind the way Take-Mikazuchi had, and Susano-O and Suzuka Gongen were stronger than their predecessors, Amaterasu and Kamui were in major trouble.

Time to pull out everything he had. Kanji roared, pulling out and crushing his card in one smooth motion, and fired a Ziodyne straight into Souji. He heard the crack of thunder, saw the flash of yellow light - but the bolt was lost somewhere in between, like every drop of power had been sucked out.

He cursed out loud. "Ted! Ice!"

Chie launched into a roundhouse kick, smacking one shadow into two others. "Already-ungh, already tried it!"

_Guys, we're in trouble!_ Rise's voice inside his head, and a wave of unfamiliar panic rushed with it. _Senpai's strong against all elements and he can call them all too. Keep Yukiko and Teddie safe!_

Across the room, Yosuke was still bloodied from the last ice blast. Kanji bolted toward him. Yukiko needed help and Yosuke couldn't handle all those guys alone, even if-

He saw the explosion of light a split-second before he heard the sound - felt his heart leap into his throat somewhere in-between - so it was by luck alone that he'd veered sideways just before the Megidola hit. The shockwave still threw him almost five meters back. He slammed into the ground hard, with a sharp burst of pain as a rib cracked.

Fucking _hell_. None of their elemental stuff had made a scratch, the one kick Chie had managed to land at the start of the fight had almost knocked her out, and now Souji had Almighty. Kanji tried to stand but his legs were shaking - _c'mon y'damn pussy, just get up _- and it was all he could do to dodge a shadow strike from above.

"Souji, stop it!" Yosuke was spinning and slicing desperately with his knives through the shadows, blood trickling from his head as Teddie tried to cover Yukiko behind him. "We don't need to do this, we-" He was cut off by a streak of lightning bursting through the air just above him and missing Teddie by inches. Ted stumbled forward, then fired a panicked shot of ice back. _Don't bother_, Kanji was about to call out, _heal up the others instead _- but something moved above and behind him, the dull hiss of a shadow and a rush of air.

He braced himself for the impact, his teeth clenched and muscles tight. _You can take it, the bastard's only you and-_

The blow never came. Instead there was a shriek - a sound he'd never heard these freaks make - just before his own shadowed body hit the floor beside him, melting into black liquid within moments.

He rolled over, and his jaw dropped. "Naoto! Holy shit, you just-"

But something was _wrong_: not just her eyes, everything in her expression. It was cold and blank and bloodless, and when the sword in her hands glowed brighter as she lifted it into a swing, Kanji didn't let himself think before smashing the steel plate hard against her head and jumping to his feet.

* * *

The first blow vibrated through her skull, jaw, teeth - but it didn't hurt. Naoto spat blood onto the floor, sword still held steady, then pivoted back toward the boy. The shadows parted around her in waves. He had to be saying something to her, because his lips were moving - but all she could hear was the rush of blood in her ears and the same familiar, double-layered voice.

_- What do you intend to do? -_

This was a dream. Something she was watching someone else do. She saw her hand grip the sword hilt, her legs slip into a fighting stance she didn't recall learning, her arms bring the blade up into a powerful swing. The motion was inexplicably natural, Naoto thought, watching the boy strike the glowing blade away with his shield.

_- You still have Megidola. -_

Naoto's breath caught. Her attention drifted from the scene before her, absorbed by something cold and violent stirring deep inside her chest.

...but she'd seen the silver-haired boy - Souji, she remembered - use Almighty magic just now.

_- The wild card has no immunity to it. You could wipe out him, his friends, everything. -_

The tall boy opposite her was still talking; yelling, perhaps, his face twisted with desperation.

_- You do not need them. You are better than them. Defeat them and you will have her. -_

She'd _always_ been better. From the moment she'd joined the team, from the moment she'd begun to suspect that a group of children were investigating a murder case, from the moment she'd first stepped off the train at the Inaba station and long before. The single difference had been luck. If she had been born correctly, given the right opportunities, she would have been greater than Souji.

History's mistakes could still be corrected.

_- We remember, Naoto. This is everything you wanted last year. -_

Naoto watched her sword arc again, tracing the individual movements of the muscles in her hands and wrists, and watched her legs follow the stroke in a fluid movement. The tall boy ducked beneath, his head passing barely a half-meter from hers - and their eyes met.

_- But you wanted something else too, remember? -_

The boy stared at her, and now Naoto felt _everything_: the weight of the sword in her hands, the throbbing pain in the side of her head, the stinging cuts in her back from the mirror shards. The roaring in her ears died away, replaced by the sounds of battle and a single pleading voice.

"-c'mon, _please_, I don't want to-"

_I know you, _Naoto thought.

- _Do__ not repeat your mistakes, Naoto. She does not have you yet. -_

Her hands raised the sword again, but her grip was loose, the motion slower.

"I know you're there, man! Just fucking-"

-_You were not empty when she started. She had no time. You were only the spare. You were never supposed to be part of this - and that is why we exist. -_

The tall boy dodged the slash with ease. Naoto stumbled forward, her legs no longer working in unison.

Her lips parted, ready to speak - _who are you, I know you_- but the words started and finished in a single hiss of air.

Large, warm hands clamped firmly over her shoulders. "Naoto! It's me, c'mon, don't do this!"

There was a sickening lurch, another rush in her ears, and the boy's lips were moving silently again. Naoto watched one elbow thrust into his ribs, and saw her hands shove him backwards when he doubled up. He hit a mirror surface hard, still gasping for the air she'd knocked out of his chest.

The sword the sword use the sword she needed to do what she'd been told she needed to-

- _Naoto, you can stop this. Remember. -_

The boy did not move and her hands were tight round the hilt, blade pointed forward like a spear.

Her legs launched her into a run-

- _Naoto. -_

- arms holding the sword out to her side -

- _Naoto. -_

- the tip of the blade thrust forward -

- _Remember. -_

- and smashed into the mirror beside the boy's chest.

Sweating and gasping, Naoto finally pried her hands away from the hilt. She turned to the boy, and-

* * *

_"Kanji!"_

Holy fucking shit.

Naoto was facing him, eyes wide and staring and a pale grey-blue. Kanji still couldn't breathe for the sharp pain firing through his chest, but he wasn't sure he even wanted to, for fear of breaking this. _Don't think she's back, don't, because she'll just-_

The sword clattered to the floor and Naoto lurched backwards. "Kanji, I-I-" She doubled over, choking. His arms were around her before he had time to catch his breath.

"Dammit, Naoto, are - are you-" Still too hard to speak. He gave up and clutched her closer, wincing at the wrenching stabs of pain in his stomach and chest.

The shadows were circling them again. None of them looked like Naoto - she wasn't even reflected in the mirror right next to them, which was just damn weird - but they weren't afraid of her anymore either. Kanji couldn't see past them, but he could hear the others still fighting: Chie's yells every time she landed a kick, the faint whistle of Yosuke's daggers slicing through the air, Kanzeon's quiet hum, the crackle and hiss of Yukiko's and Teddie's healing magic. Somehow they were all still standing, even though Souji had been hurling out almost every type of attack Kanji had ever seen.

Naoto lifted her head. "I-I'm sorry, I couldn't - it was her again, the same woman, she-"

"I know. Got to Souji-senpai, right?"

She nodded, and stared down at the sword. "I-I thought I was going to - I dreamt I would..." Her arm slid over his back and clutched his jacket.

"Look, we gotta talk later, okay?" Probably only had seconds before these shadow freaks decided they _definitely_weren't scared of Naoto now. "I'm gonna get you over to Yukiko-senpai, okay? She'll fix you up." Yosuke had been hurting bad last time he saw, but if they could get Naoto up and fighting she'd take the pressure off him and they could-

"No."

"What?"

"He doesn't know me as he does you. He can't use my weaknesses. And..." she added, actually half-smiling, "...I do not use elemental abilities."

Wait. Light and Dark, and Almighty. Souji had used one of them. The team hadn't been able to test any.

...But Naoto was in no fit state to go running off anywhere. Yosuke needed her help bad and she could just get bust up worse.

(Or, Kanji didn't let himself think, she could get sucked straight back in.)

He swallowed hard. His mouth tasted of metal. "No. Ain't safe."

"It's the only logical choice," Naoto told him, voice firmer than he'd heard in months. She gestured towards her own Izanagi, still frozen next to Souji's. "My Persona can compete with his. The rest of you are too vulnerable and already weakened."

"No. No way." He gripped her tighter, still bent over her back. "Pulling stupid shit ain't gonna make up for last year, Naoto, it-"

Naoto let out a long, unsteady breath. "I apologize, Kanji-kun."

Then his legs shot out from under his body - dammit, she'd fucking kicked him! - and Kanji hit the floor hard, letting go of her on the way. Pain burst through his chest again, the Shadows moved in closer and Naoto was gone, running towards Souji at the other end of the platform.

* * *

She shouldn't have left him, he was in no fit state to fight, but if she could do this _quickly_...

_- Good work, Naoto. -_

_Who are you,_ Naoto asked. _Both of you._

_- We were Sukuna-Hikona and Izanagi. Together, we are something else. -_

Naoto remembered Sukuna-Hikona: a tiny creature, smaller even than her. His size had been both cruelly appropriate and admirably deceptive. He'd been silent since last year and his was one of the only voices she'd ever missed.

But she couldn't summon him anymore. She had lost him, how could he be-

_- Even if it cannot be seen, the smaller lends power to the whole. And, in our case, breaks the chains. -_

She looked up at her Izanagi: still floating tall near the center of the room, head dropped to its chest.

_- We are Kokū Izanagi, and we were always there, Naoto. You only refused to hear. Listen now and we can end this. -_

The mirror silhouettes closed around her, lunging and grabbing. She saw all six of the others outlined in black, but not herself - which was as she'd hoped.

_- Yes. She has the wildcard already. But together we are unknown to her, as you are to him. -_

Naoto lashed out at one silhouette as she dodged past, vaulted over another on the floor. Despite her lack of a weapon, she was hardly helpless, and Souji was near; she could see him standing beneath the red glow of his Izanagi, one arm raised for his next attack.

_Tell me how to do this_, she asked.

_- Mudoon. -_

Naoto stopped dead.

She couldn't use that. They knew full well the consequences.

_- The death of the self. The hollowing out of the space Izanami filled. The survival of the whole. -_

The woman had spoken of the trinity. Souji was hope, and hope could not be allowed to die. Even without knowing that, the team had always instinctively put him first. An unspoken rule, based on a deep, primal instinct.

_- We know this. It is a risk. But it is our only option. -_

Souji was barely six meters away, caught in the middle of casting Agidyne. This was her best chance.

Naoto took a deep breath, and started running.

* * *

Fuck it, he shouldn't have let her go!

Kanji knew he couldn't have stopped her. Kick or not, he wasn't fit to follow; he'd have gone down in seconds if not for Teddie firing off a Mediarahan, probably the last the poor little guy had left. They were all fighting stronger now - Chie's calls were louder and he could see Yosuke moving faster - but with their two healers both worn down to nothing, it was only a matter of time.

He couldn't see Naoto for the shadows. Half of him hoped she could pull off whatever she was planning. The other half was terrified of what would happen if she did.

* * *

Naoto felt rather than heard the hum of magic behind her. A healing spell. The sound was almost a comfort - if this plan worked, and Izanami realized she stood to lose her favourite puppet, the team might need to be at full strength. Naoto's footsteps echoed against the tiles of the platform, rang up through her bones - yet Souji, mid-cast, still hadn't heard or seen her.

_- Closer, Naoto. _

Two more strides.

The flames in Izanagi's hands coalesced into a single fiery mass.

_- Closer. -_

Her palm was already open, a faint glow enveloping her fingers.

_**- Now**__. -_

Everything happened at once.

Souji's Izanagi raised one arm and threw the fireball into the center of the room just as her card shattered in her fist. _"Mudoon!"_

To her side shadows burned and scattered, and she heard Chie and Yosuke both cry out in pain - but the sound vanished as Kokū Izanagi jerked to life and pivoted toward Souji far quicker than it should be able, hands and arms already swathed in swirling darkness. Naoto stopped moving, allowing the Persona to draw out her strength - but Souji turned, saw her, broke into a run toward her instead. Above and behind her, she felt Kokū Izanagi dragging the energy from the air, fusing a dark empty space between its hands, and she stared Souji in the eyes as he ran. _I'm sorry if this fails._

Empty spaces existed to be filled. When Mudoon burst from Kokū Izanagi's hands, it sought the nearest and strongest source of energy. Souji didn't look up and didn't see the darkness rushing toward them. Didn't even know it was coming, or at least Naoto told herself, because the alternative meant that he was fully aware of this: fully aware that he might be about to die and yet willing to take the risk.

The empty space swept over them both, darker than the black above the platform, plunging them into silence and sending a cold, prickling shiver over her skin; a sensation which vanished under the weight of Souji crashing into her, his hands pushing hard against her chest, lips open and screaming silently over her shoulder as the Mudoon tore out everything he had through eyes and ears and mouth.

_Please be enough_, Naoto thought, wrapping her arms tight around him. Something was wrong. She felt dizzy. Kokū Izanagi was still raw and unfamiliar, perhaps she didn't have full control of him, what if she'd done this wrong and too much was taken and Souji was-

His jaw snapped shut and he sank over her shoulder. He wasn't a dead weight, far from it - which meant it had worked, she was certain - but Naoto couldn't hold him up. Instead she found herself holding onto _him _instead, which made no sense - none at all.

Empty space filled and sated, Mudoon dissipated. Sound rushed back in, this time the shrieking sounds of shadows dying - and to her right, Naoto could see figures melting down into pools of ichor.

Souji raised his head, and when he pulled back, his eyes were a steady grey. Naoto tried to speak, wanting to verify that her plan had worked, but there was no air in her lungs. Her mouth tasted of metal as she felt her heart shuddering against her ribs; heard Kanji cry out somewhere behind her; watched Souji whisper something she couldn't hear as he stared down between them at his hands, holding the sword speared clean through her chest.


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: Sorry for the delay in updates, and to those I owe responses...didn't have internet access for a while, still trying to catch up. My apologies._

* * *

**9.**

Kanji only managed to call her name once. His throat seemed to tighten up, _close_ up, so sudden he had no time to catch his breath.

Naoto let go of Souji and staggered backward. The sword, still tight in his grip, jerked out of her chest with a sudden spurt of blood. Kanji thought he heard Rise cry out from somewhere behind him, or maybe just in his head, he couldn't tell. As the sword clattered to the floor, Yosuke darted forward and grabbed Souji by the shoulders, said something Kanji didn't catch because now he was running too, toward Naoto - who lurched back a few more steps, one hand clutched over her chest, then fell to her knees and toppled forward.

At the edge of his vision, both Izanagis flickered out of existence - but then the world _rippled_ again, stronger this time. The way heat distorted everything in the summer, except the air had thickened too. A split-second later and Kanji was struggling through quicksand, fighting against an invisible tide that tried to shove him back to the other side of the platform. Yosuke and Souji were thrown backward too, staggering and stumbling, each clutching at the other to keep him upright.

Kanji pushed harder. Fuck, he needed to get to Naoto, he-

_"Enough. Unhand the wildcard. He is not yours."_

The voice echoed through his head, his chest, his entire body. At the center of the room, floating above the floor, was a woman he didn't recognize - no bigger than a regular person, but her skin was chalk white, her eyes red, and she was surrounded by the same fog the team had wandered through to get here.

"Wildcard...?" Yosuke looked up, voice tight and teeth clenched. "Who're you-"

_"He is not yours,_" the woman repeated - and Kanji realized then that her gaze was fixed on Souji. "_You have done well to reach him. Better than I ever expected - but this has lasted long enough."_

"Well, he isn't yours either!" Chie was fighting to move too, Kanji could tell by the way her muscles tensed and twitched, but she was trapped by the air just as firmly as him. "Who _are_ you, anyway?"

_"I am Izanami. I seek to give humanity what they desire."_

"Funny way of doing it," Yosuke snapped. "How the hell would _you_ know what we want?"

_"Humans ache to show their suppressed sides, just as they need to know the weaknesses of others and so define themselves in turn."_ Her gaze stayed on Souji, still half-slumped over Yosuke's shoulder. _"The wildcard understands this better than most. I simply created a window to allow this."_

"A window?"

_"On rainy nights, when the darkness swallows sight and sound, the window shows what humans desire."_

"...You mean the Midnight Channel, don't you?" Yukiko was trying to move toward Naoto, just as Teddie was struggling toward Souji.

_"Yes. I created this 'channel', as you call it, just as I wrapped the world in fog. Both were what you and your people longed for."_

Yosuke growled: a tight, angry noise. "You - if you made the fog, and the Midnight Channel - then you're the reason Saki-senpai died!"

It seemed like a stretch. Whatever this Izanami woman was, Kanji had the feeling she was part of something way bigger; that Saki's death, ultimately, had been nothing more than splash damage. A small part of him wondered when Hanamura would finally realize this. The rest - attention back on Naoto, unmoving on the floor - was faced with a sudden, sickening lurch of recognition.

_"No. The deaths were engineered by the trinity, created to test humanity's potential just as I tested their desires. I simply pushed them along their own paths. Hope, emptiness, despair. The question was which would prevail."_

"I-I don't understand." Teddie glanced around at the tiles, the shattered mirrors, the empty space above the platform. "How did you change everythi-" He stopped, and fiercely shook his head. "Please, just let us fix Sensei and Nao-chan!"

_"There is no point. The trinity have fallen. Those who could enter this place unaided have been bested by it."_

"Souji-senpai, Naoto-kun, Namatame." Rise's voice was thin and nervous. "You mean them, right?"

_"Yes. Despair was weak and misunderstood his purpose. Hope endured, though only with the support of others. But emptiness was a different matter."_

"You mean Naoto," Kanji whispered, still staring across the room. She was sprawled face-down on the floor and she still wasn't moving and neither could he.

_"She was not the first. _He_ might have succeeded. She could not - but nonetheless, she demonstrated well the _true_ nature of humanity. Humans are empty. They do not hope."_

"Shut the fuck up and let me get to her!" He was choking on something, had to be the air, but he just needed to reach Naoto and then they'd both be-

"What do you know about humans, anyway?" Chie snapped. "We _have_ hope. We have Souji and we're gonna get Naoto-kun and we-"

_"The test is concluded. You cannot prevail. But..."_ - and here Izanami stared at Souji again - _"you contain something else, wildcard. I gifted his name to you all, but _you._..you are..."_

"He's no longer yours." Souji finally said, voice scratchy, raw - yet firm. "He abandoned you long ago."

And during that last sentence, Izanami's expression - once cool and empty - shifted. It became something ancient and tired, filled with things Kanji didn't think he understood and didn't want to, because Naoto was on the floor and he was still swimming in the air - and it vanished as quickly as it had appeared. Izanami leveled her gaze on Souji, all trace of emotion now lost. _"A sin I will correct. You are mine, and I will keep you."_

"No." Souji unwrapped his arm from Yosuke's shoulders and pushed himself upright. "I choose to fight. _We _choose to fight."

_"As you desire. And you will fall."_

The quicksand dissolved. Kanji was suddenly light, had the sensation of almost floating as his legs finally broke loose from the thinning air. Around him, the others fell into combat stances: Chie and Yosuke side by side with Souji, and Rise a few meters behind them, Kanzeon's visor already settling over her face. Yukiko and Teddie, critically low on magic and with almost nothing left to give, had fallen back even further.

Kanji glanced at Souji. _Let me go, man, please._

Souji paused, just for an moment - then gave a quick nod.

With a deep breath, Kanji launched himself into a stumbling dash across the room.

* * *

Her mouth didn't just taste of metal anymore, it was full of it, and Kokū Izanagi was silent.

Naoto was a rationalist. Obviously she was dying. The wound in her chest no longer hurt and the only discomfort came from lying on her stomach with her cheek pressed against the cold floor, unable to lift her head. It was difficult to even see; everything had taken on a strange, de-saturated appearance, all the edges blurred. The truth, she knew, was this: Souji was free but Izanami had awakened, and though the team would fight, they would doubtless lose. And before all that, Naoto would die here alone.

Perhaps, she let herself think, because it hardly mattered now, this made up for last year. Perhaps this would balance out the mistakes she'd made and the selfish actions she'd taken. Perhaps the team might even win. Each hope more ridiculous than the last, yet still a comfort.

The sound of uneven running footsteps nearby, closer and closer, definitely wasn't.

_No, no,_ Naoto thought desperately. _Go back and fight, there's nothing you can do._ The team _needed_ Kanji, and she didn't want him to see her like this, sprawled face down and bleeding out - but there was little she could do as strong hands grabbed her shoulders and rolled her onto her back.

Kanji stared down at her. "Oh shit, Naoto, don't- fuck it, you d-didn't hafta..." He sounded broken and his cheeks were already wet - and Naoto couldn't stand seeing him fighting not to cry, not again, because she'd seen it once before, when he'd left her last year, even though he'd tried his best to hide it. And she'd never really been worth it.

She blinked at him. _Go help them_, she tried to say, but all she managed was a bubbling, choking sound. Her lungs felt clogged with liquid.

"Y-You're an idiot, you know that?" he stuttered, one trembling hand stroking through her hair.

_Go help them_, Naoto tried to tell him again. The result was no better. Half of her wished she'd died outright, so he wouldn't be wasting his time. The other, selfish half was grateful she hadn't.

* * *

Kanji wasn't stupid. One look told him Naoto wouldn't get up and walk away from this one.

Yukiko and Teddie didn't have enough left. They couldn't even heal the others, despite the heavy hits Izanami was dealing - and the vial of medicine in his jacket was meant for cuts and scrapes, not a fucking sword through the chest. He tried to press a hand over the wound but it was useless, the blood wouldn't stop coming and too much of it had already soaked through Naoto's shirt and coat and pooled around her on the floor.

Instead, he bunched up his sleeve and reached up to wipe the blood from her chin. "You did it," he told her, softly. "Brought Souji-senpai back. He's gonna take that bitch down, we all are, we're gonna try. Be outta here in no time." He swallowed. "I know it probably hurts, but we'll get Yukiko-senpai and Ted up and rolling again, just hang on a bit."

Naoto blinked again - and she needed to stop looking at him like that and fucking say something, because his chest was about to rip open too. Then her stare moved away, somewhere past his shoulder. Kanji's first instinct was to grab her chin and make her look at him, until he realized her eyes were still focused.

He turned his head. Izanami had vanished - or the woman had - and in her place was a giant, writhing tangle of spine and claws and twisted bone, taller than any Persona he'd seen. He'd missed its arrival completely, blocked out every sound except Naoto's ragged breathing.

Kanji looked back at her. "No. I_ ain't _leaving you here."

Her fingers twitched, and he grabbed them on instinct.

Behind him, he heard Yukiko scream. When he snapped his head around, Chie was standing where Souji had been, snared in place by dark limbs curling up from a pool at her feet. She was struggling, trying to wrench away, but the hands kept tugging her down - and within moments, she vanished into the black.

Naoto's fingers curled around and squeezed his own, almost too lightly to notice.

Fuck it, this wasn't-

Yosuke was the next to cry out. Kanji didn't need to look back.

"I ain't leaving," he said again, wrapping Naoto's hand in his own.

_You have to, man. You gotta do this._

Rokuten Maoh. Sounded like him, as usual. He'd always thought that was just stupid, that something as strong and ancient as a Persona would talk smart.

Shut up, he told it. Leave me alone.

_Can't do anything for her now. You know that. And Senpai needs you._

Naoto blinked. Kanji could hardly hear her breathe.

_Come on, man._

He choked back a sob. Fuck it, he _wasn't _a pussy, he'd keep this together. He shifted, trying to lift Naoto up, and felt something move inside his jacket pocket. It clinked against the medicine vial, the sound thin and metallic.

That stupid watch. She should've taken it with her. Good luck charm. Would've kept her safe. He pulled it out with his free hand, let go of hers with the other. Opened up her palm, put the watch inside, closed her fingers. It sparked a memory, one he pushed out of his head.

There was no choice. Naoto was probably already pissed at him for wasting time.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his forehead pressed against hers. "Gonna come back for you, I promise." Then he forced himself to his feet and raced back towards Souji, already seeing the next set of black limbs shooting out from the floor.

* * *

Naoto saw it all, but wasn't part of it.

The thin black hands pulled each of them down in turn, into strange dark pools with glowing edges. None of them went quietly. Least of all Kanji. He was wrenching and lashing out till the last moment, when Naoto - head tilted to one side, cheek pressed against the cold platform - watched him be swallowed by the dark.

It hurt, because she'd thought Kanji, of all people, would be able to help Souji - and because it was him and she was still dying and there was nothing she could do about it.

And Souji...Souji stood, stared, watched Kanji, then glanced at her.

Naoto's first, delusional instinct was to get up and help him.

Then there was a pool at his feet, with nobody left to push him aside. The hands snapped around his arms, his calves, his throat, and he didn't fight. When he vanished, Izanami went with him, and so did the mirrors. The platform plunged into darkness.

Breathing became impossible. Her body felt light, then heavy - then nothing.


	10. Chapter 10

_A/N: Thanks to AuraGemi, who reminded me I'd completely forgotten to finish posting this story...many apologies to those of you who've been following it, I have a memory like a sieve._

* * *

**10. **

The dark hands and fingers had been like ice - but now, Kanji's insides felt even colder than his skin.

Maybe he was dead. Wouldn't be a surprise. But as outcomes went, that was pretty damn awful, so he decided to blame the fog instead. It was thinner here, but still looked like he was standing on it. He glanced around and the others weren't there - no Souji, which was good, but also no Yosuke or Chie or anyone else. Not even Yukiko, who he'd seen go just a couple seconds before him. And no Naoto eit—

Fuck.

Just for one single second, Kanji considered sitting down right there and never getting up.

He hated himself for it almost immediately - _yeah, she'd just love that, asshole _- so he didn't. That wasn't him. He wouldn't just roll over and die. Naoto was probably gone and there was nothing he could do about it, but the others - well, maybe he could get something right for once.

He started walking.

* * *

The first surprise was that she could move. The second came when she pulled herself into a sitting position, looked down, and found that while her shirt was soaked with blood, the wound over her ribs had vanished.

Naoto supposed that made sense, if she was dead. Injuries were unlikely to carry over to...whatever, if anything, came next. That did not explain why Souji Seta was lying limp on the ground - the fog, really - a few feet away. They were the only people visible. Souji, Naoto decided, was unlikely to feature greatly in any potential afterlife, meaning they were somewhere else.

Not only that, the pocketwatch was still in her hand. She vaguely remembered Kanji giving it to her before he...

Regardless, she should not be able to carry over objects here. Meaning there might still be a reason to fight.

Her legs remained unsteady, so she crawled over to Souji on hands and knees, then shook him by the shoulder. "Senpai, get up."

No reaction. His skin was ashen, his lips slightly parted - but the steady rise and fall of his chest made her ask again. "Souji. Get up."

_**He is elsewhere.**_

Kokū Izanagi. He - they, it, Naoto wasn't sure - had fallen silent the moment Souji's sword had—

She shook her head. _You're still there? _she asked. If she had died, then surely her Persona would have been released?

_**We remain for now. You will have a choice to make, Naoto.**_

Choice?

...Whatever it might be, Naoto would deal with it later. Right now, she needed to help Souji.

_** The wildcard's spirit is trapped. He must be pulled back.**_

_Tell me how.  
_  
_**Remind him of his ties to the living world. Your comrades are doing much the same.**_

_I don't understand.  
_  
_**Talk to him.**_

This was not the answer Naoto would have preferred. Her few meetings with Souji since her return to Inaba had been awkward and largely silent, any discussion firmly centered on their nightmares and the need to find out the true cause. Save her initial apology, they had never again discussed her actions last year. In an ideal world, they never would. She had done her best to face her crimes but she wasn't _ready _for this, she wasn't -

_**But selfishness led you here, didn't it?**_

Naoto looked down at Souji - then sighed.

She swallowed. "Senpai. I believe I owe you an explanation."

* * *

He was just lying there. That wasn't what Souji did. Something had gone wrong.

"Senpai, you there?"

Souji didn't move. Didn't even open his eyes.

Kanji clenched his fists. No way had they come this far just to lose it all. Because if they lost Souji – well, Souji was everything. "Senpai, you better be listening," Kanji snapped. "You gonna let it all finish here?" It came out harsher than he'd expected - the guy had been been half-dead for months, not like Kanji wanted to finish the job - but he couldn't help it. This whole thing pissed him off: how hard they'd worked to get here, how they'd all tried to save him. How Naoto had died doing it.

Kanji let out a breath; the only movement in the still air. "You ain't like that," he told Souji, quietly. "You don't just quit."

Even as he was talking, he could hear other voices start up.

_You can keep going - right, partner?_

He knew that one. Definitely Yosuke. Even in the thinning fog Kanji still couldn't see him, but he had to be nearby.

_You understood me, and that's why I can become as strong as I need to be. Don't you dare give up!_

Chie, that time. Kanji knelt down beside Souji, considered for a moment gripping his hand, but squeezed his shoulder instead. "See, Senpai? The others are all pushing for you too."

_Souji-kun…please get back up, just once more. We need you._

"That's why we did it. Took those hits and went under. You matter to all of us."

_I'm glad I came back to Inaba, Senpai. We'll be your strength, okay?_

"I owe you, man. You did more for me than anyone I ever met. Taught me s'okay to be myself, that maybe I could be worth something." Kanji let out a long, slow breath. "Without that, I don't think I coulda handled what happened with Naoto. And - I'm sorry I couldn't stop her."

_I'll always protect you, Sensei!_

"And, and I know you and her - well, okay, maybe I don't. And it don't matter now, 'cause she's..." He swallowed. "But I'm sorry for getting jealous. If, if you and her had - I woulda been fine with it. Maybe not at first, but eventually. You're a better guy than I'll ever be. That'll always be true no matter what happens."

Souji still didn't move - but Kanji swore his eyelids flickered.

More voices, this time people Kanji didn't know, but they were all overlapping, telling Souji the same thing: get up and keep fighting. Kanji's own voice grew firmer and louder. "So you gotta come back, yeah? You're too important. I can hear everyone else tellin' you that too. We all listened to you, so listen to us for once, Senpai. Don't be stubborn."

He couldn't help grinning, then. Like _he _was one to talk about stubbornness. But Souji would get what he meant. He always did.

"That's all I got," Kanji said, still smiling. "Now get back here so we can finish this up."

* * *

"I may have been Izanami's pawn, but it was my selfishness and bitterness that allowed that to occur."

Souji didn't react, but Naoto hadn't expected him to yet. Too much left to say. There were voices in the fog insisting that he keep fighting, some she recognized and some she didn't. Kanji's was among them. Naoto wasn't happy to hear him, given the implications.

She sighed. "Souji-senpai...no apology can compensate for what I did to Nanako and to your family in turn, or for my betrayal of the team. I - I'd never intended to become close to any of you. I believed myself far superior." Her fists clenched reflexively as she forced down the sudden heavy thickness in her throat. "The truth is, Senpai, I have always been jealous of you. I still am. I have always defined myself by being the best, the most competent - and when you proved more successful in solving the case and then in so many other ways, I – I hated you for it. That - is no longer wholly the case."

She needed to be honest. On some level, she still resented him, and she probably always would. You could not, Naoto thought, spend an entire lifetime defining yourself by your superiority to other people and then readily accept that you were not. Her progress so far had come by reminding herself that, rationally, the most capable person should lead, and that she was worth more than her abilities alone. The second part was hard to swallow. Yet the truth remained: Souji was the key to all of this. Not her.

"You must return," she told him. "You are vital to this whole puzzle. And - you are truly a good person. The world would be a worse place without you."

"The...same's true for you, N-Naoto."

Naoto blinked.

Souji's eyes were only half-open and his voice was little more than a whisper - but he was awake. "Senpai!"

"I - I need to..." He tried and failed to lift his head. Naoto wrapped her arm round his shoulders and helped him into a sitting position. "I heard the others, I..."

"Don't push yourself, Senpai. I am uncertain what happened, but—"

He grabbed her other arm and looked her in the eye. It was deeply unsettling. "Naoto - I'm sorry. I couldn't stop myself. I was just watching."

"You've no reason to apologize. The same happened to me." Naoto glanced away. "I almost killed Kanji-kun."

Souji looked away. "You did well to resist. I'm so sorry I couldn't." He pulled himself to his feet then, Naoto doing little more than steady him. "I have to fight Izanami. It's the only way to end this, and I owe that to the others. I heard them calling me, bringing me back."

"I will help," she told him firmly, running her fingers over the metal in her hand.

"You can't. This has to be me. You _know _that, Naoto."

He was right - but he was still weak. "Can you truly handle this alone?"

"I think so." His hand moved to his head. "I'm stronger than when I entered. When I felt Adachi's presence vanish from the world, I – there was this _rush_, like electricity down my spine. I think – his abilities were added to my own. And...I feel like I've drawn strength from everyone. But I'm not positive."

Drawing strength? It made little sense, but gave Naoto an idea. She hesitated, then said, "I still have the power Izanami gave me. If we can combine it with yours, you may stand a chance."

Souji shook his head. "The way you arrived here...it was different. Vastly." He looked away. "True death, not a curse. If you help me, I - don't know if you'll make it back."

"That isn't an issue," Naoto said - surprising herself at how much she meant it.

"No. I can't ask you to make that choice, it's my role as leader to-"

She grabbed his hand. "Take what you need," she said, quietly. "And please, take my apology."

* * *

Kanji couldn't really explain the rest. Souji just disappeared, sank into the fog, but he had the feeling that was supposed to happen.

The next moment, the world _shuddered. _He hit the ground again, harder this time - and then it was as if he wasn't in his body at all. Like he was floating in the fog. And he somehow knew the others were close by, could feel their presence even if he still couldn't see them.

Except for Naoto. It hurt, but he wasn't surprised.

And it didn't seem as important, either. Nothing did right now - not the fog, not the floating, nothing except watching Souji stand upright, sword in his hand, in front of Izanami's twisted tangle of arms and claws. Senpai was _different_, practically buzzing with raw energy, stronger even than the ripples of power radiating from the goddess.

He was gonna _win _this.

A burst of lightning crackled out from Izanami's claws and slammed into Souji head-on, but he didn't flinch. Izanami started talking to him, saying stuff Kanji couldn't hear, then tossed out another Ziodyne. Still, Souji stayed standing - and a card appeared in his hand, glowing electric blue.

_"Izanagi-no-Okami!"_

There was a searing, terrifying explosion of light, a crackle-hiss of energy through the air. Kanji felt himself being pulled backwards, as if someone was trying to twist and turn him inside out, and just before everything turned dark, he glimpsed a figure in the air: masked, brilliant white, holding a glowing sword.

* * *

Whatever Souji had taken had _hurt_; a wrenching pain Naoto hadn't thought possible for the dead to experience. But now, watching him stand in front of Izanami, it seemed inconsequential. The mass of bone and claws was swaying and made no effort to attack him.

When she spoke, Izanami's voice was weak. _"How could I be defeated? How am I the one to disappear?" _ Then, softer still,_"Why would you do this again?"_

Naoto watched Souji lift his head. "I'm not him," he said, firm and calm.

Izanami twisted in a flash of light - and appeared again as the silver-haired woman, floating a few feet above the ground with her arms crossed over her shoulders. _"You could chose to return with me, Izanagi. To defy the endless struggle,"_ she said, _"to wrap yourself in lies and live in blissful ignorance."_

"I told you, I'm not him. I'm sorry." He held out his hand - an echo of something Naoto remembered long ago, a handshake at the Moel gas station. "But I can't be him."

_"You are a mirror. You can take any form you wish."_

"No. I'm more than that. My friends...they showed me. And ignorance isn't what I want. I don't think it's what _anyone _wants."

Izanami looked down at him. "_But is that not true peace for humans? Is that not what the people of Inaba desired?"_

Maybe she simply had intended to grant humanity their wishes – but from the haunted way Izanami looked at Souji, Naoto wasn't so certain.

Souji shook his head. "Sometimes, we take the easy route out. Sometimes, lies are just easier. But we're capable of more than that."

A long, long pause. When Izanami finally spoke again, the edge of sadness in her voice was gone, replaced with resignation – and perhaps a hint or pride._"__You__ may not be him...but you have already exceeded what I thought humanity to be capable of. You have lifted the fog in this world and in your own. And whether that will lead to happiness or not...rests on your shoulders."_ Even though Naoto was far away, she swore she saw - or felt - Izanami smile._ "Children of man - well done!"_

* * *

"Kanji-kun?"

_Get lost_, he thought.

"Kanji-kun, wake up!"

No. Just needed a bit more rest, was all. Whoever it was could damn well wait.

"Kanji-kun, I swear, if you don't get up right now I'm gonna kick you in the head!"

Wait a second. Only one person talked like that. Kanji's eyes flew open - and saw Chie kneeling over him, face creased into a frown.

"Uh..." His tongue felt thick in his mouth, his throat like it was coated with sandpaper. "Wha' happen'd?"

"I dunno. But you, you need to get up, _now._" She yanked hard at the collar of his shirt and dragged him into a sitting position.

"Dammit, Chie-senpai, calm-" Then he glanced around her side. Naoto was lying on the ground behind - _grass_, he noticed, which made no sense - and she wasn't moving.

"Yukiko's trying to heal her, but I don't-" Chie shook her head. "Get over there, Kanji-kun, _please._"

He didn't need to be told twice. It was a scramble on hands and knees but he was at Naoto's side within seconds.

Kanji had been fighting with the team almost a year now. He'd thought he knew how fear felt - the way his vision turned dark at the edges, his breath went tight, his heart pounded rapid and staccato against his ribs. Turned out he didn't, at all, because none of that was like the rush that had coursed through him when Naoto had first gone down earlier or the wave of panic hitting him now. "Is she-"

"Not breathing," Yukiko told him, hands glowing - one on Naoto's forehead, the other on her chest. The glow enveloped both of them completely - swallowed him too, when he grabbed Naoto's left hand - but she still didn't move.

"What..." His breath caught in his throat. "What about Souji-senpai?"

"Ted's with him," Chie said. Kanji glanced up. Souji was lying a few meters away, his head cradled in Yosuke's lap, Rise kneeling opposite and Teddie at his side, hands glowing the same as Yukiko's. "He's still out - but I think he's doing better than..."

Yosuke looked up. "He's talked. He isn't making any sense but he's in there _somewhere_. Is Naoto-"

"Don't know," muttered Yukiko. "I have to concentrate."

Wasn't like her. Yukiko was always polite, even if she tended to crack up laughing at bad moments. Never abrupt.

Kanji looked down. Except for how pale Naoto was, she looked like she was just sleeping, but the blood on her shirt gave it away even if the cut itself was gone. Her skin glowed again, his hand with it - and when the light died away, there was nothing.

Yukiko lifted her head, skin almost as ashen as Naoto's. "I-I don't think it's working."

"You gotta keep trying," he snapped - and he knew it was harsh, Yukiko already looked ready to drop, but he felt desperate and completely fucking helpless and she needed to _keep going. _"You've gotta bring her back!"

Chie glanced at Yukiko, who looked away. Yosuke and Teddie just stared down at Souji.

A hand landed gently on his shoulder, and Rise appeared at his side. "Talk to her, Kanji-kun," she told him. "That's what Kanzeon told me to do with Souji-senpai."

"That, that was back in _there_. It ain't gonna work out here." He didn't even know where _here _was. There was green everywhere, trees and water, and it might've been beautiful if he wasn't holding Naoto's hand and watching her lie motionless on the grass. "She ain't-"

"You gonna give up like that?" Chie shook her head. "No way."

"You have to try, dude." Yosuke looked up again, his hands still under Souji's head. "I guess - maybe everyone deserves a second shot. And even if it doesn't work, you need to..." He let out a long breath. "You know what I mean, right?"

"But it ain't like with Senpai. How do I even-" Then Kanji glanced at Naoto's other hand. That dumb watch was still loose in her grip.

He felt Rise's hand move to the back of his head. "You gave her that, right? It might be enough of a connection. I think I can help you, with Kanzeon. Close your eyes and just think it." There was a smile in her voice. "Kanzeon can't help me eavesdrop, I promise."

Kanji swallowed, nodded - then closed his eyes.

* * *

He'd done it. Souji had actually _won_.

Naoto still wasn't certain what had transpired - only that she'd seen yet another Izanagi, different to her own and different to Souji's first, and that it had fired a burst of light through its ringed sword. Everything had flashed piercing, blazing white, and when her vision had cleared she'd somehow known the others were gone. Presumably they'd all been sent back to the real world - along with Souji himself.

Though the watch suddenly seemed to burn in her hand, Naoto ignored it. She smiled, if only to herself. It'd been worth it.

* * *

When Kanji opened his eyes, she was just sitting there in the fog, staring out over empty space.

"Naoto?"

She glanced over her shoulder at him, eyes wide. "Kanji-kun? Why are you - how did you even-"

"Came to get you," he said firmly, walking around her and holding out his hand.

Her gaze drifted away. "You can't. This is over."

"Bullshit! You get up right now and come back."

Naoto shook her head. "I don't believe I have much time left," she said, looking at her hands. The skin was almost translucent; Kanji could see the vague outline of the watch gripped in her right fist. "But I'm - I'm glad you came to see me."

He dropped to his knees and grabbed her shoulders, harder than he intended, and tried to ignore that his fingers nearly passed through. "I didn't come here for that, I came t'get you! Everybody's waiting out there, trying to help you. They want you back as well."

For a long moment, she said nothing.

"I doubt that," she eventually muttered. "I brought them nothing good."

"You helped us _win_. That's as good as it gets." His hand squeezed her shoulder. "We're going back, Naoto."

She looked him in the eye – almost _glared_, her eyes dark and intense. "No."

"...What?"

"This is compensation. This balances everything out." She smiled. For the first time in months, she actually looked happy. "This is how it's supposed to be."

So _that_ was what she's trying to do. Play the martyr. Kanji was trying to sound reasonable, he was fucking _trying _- but he felt tired and angry and his response came out close to a growl. "You know it don't work like that!"

"It can," she said quietly. "And it will."

"C'mon, Naoto. The stuff you did - it was selfish and shitty, but you can't just erase it. Not like this." He swallowed, dropping his hand from her shoulder to grab her own. "All you can do is do better. And y'did. You helped us save Souji."

Naoto nodded, then smiled again. "Then let's end it there. I think I'd be happier."

"_I _wouldn't."

Her expression shifted; crisp certainty now edged with doubt. She glanced away. "I - I don't think it's your place to-"

"Just, just listen for once, alright?" Kanji snatched her other hand and tried to interlock their fingers, though hers were cold and fading. "I-I wanted you back in Inaba so bad, never quit thinking about it. If y'came back just to get yourself killed, not even _try _to make it out safe, then why the hell did I even bother?"

"I never _asked _you to," she snapped, jerking out of his grip. She pulled off her cap and ran a hand through her hair. "And I-I need to - Kanji, you have to understand, I can't bear thinking about-"

"So you're gonna take the coward's way out?" he shot back. "I ain't letting that happen."

Naoto's gaze was terrifyingly cool. "_You _don't have a say."

It hurt, bad. Kanji almost wondered if she was right, that he couldn't change her mind. How could you give somebody a second chance if they refused to take it?

Then he shook his head. Bunch of crap. Sometimes you just had to do what was right. He lunged forward and wrapped his arms around her back, pulling her so tight against his chest his own muscles ached with the tension.

Naoto grunted and tried to pull away. "Wh-What are you _doing_?"

He was already thinking about the others. Souji, Chie, Yosuke, Rise, Teddie, Yukiko...they were his anchor, this time. And the same sensation as before crept over his skin, this feeling of someone tugging at the corners of his mind.

He smiled grimly, arms gripping Naoto like he'd never let go. "Sorry, Naoto. Y'don't get to be the selfish one."


	11. Chapter 11

**11.**

Waking up again was possibly the single most unpleasant experience Naoto had ever had.

It felt, for want of a better description, as if she was being wrenched back into her own body - which then shuddered back to life, leaving her coughing and choking and twisting, two pairs of hands holding her down against the ground.

Her vision was dark and her hearing muffled. She thought she could hear someone - Yukiko? - saying her name, telling her to calm down, but her muscles weren't hers to control. They lashed her arms out one final time, before she a cool hand landed on her forehead and her body fell limp. She couldn't open her eyes - but this time, she could hear the voices around her. Yukiko, Chie, Rise, talking over one another. Yukiko was telling her she'd be okay, Rise was saying something to Souji - meaning he was here too, that he must be fine - and Chie was—

Chie was talking to Kanji.

The sudden, uncontrolled burst of fury was a hot poker through Naoto's stomach. She couldn't recall ever being so angry: not at Adachi, not at Souji, not even at herself.

"Naoto?" _His _voice, this time, close to her ear.

She forced her eyes open. The bright light hurt - why was it sunny inside the television? - but she still saw his face hovering above hers, eyes full of concern. It almost made her sick.

"You okay?" he asked.

Her mouth felt thick with dust and her first attempt at speaking was little more than a hiss of air.

"Take it easy," Kanji whispered.

_Idiot_. It was his fault she was here, she remembered what he—

"Y-you had no right," Naoto finally choked out.

He frowned. "What?"

"I-I was supposed to die." That had been the ending. The way she'd compensate for her actions, put things right, and never have to think about any of it again. It would have been _perfect._

Kanji jerked away from her, eyes narrowed and face creasing with anger. "Why? So you could be a martyr? The hell good would that do?"

The others were starting to stare. At least, Rise was. Chie and Yukiko were looking everywhere and anywhere else.

Naoto tried to push herself upright. "I told you, I _told _you, that was how it—"

"Stupidest shit I ever heard!" Kanji continued to rant over top of her, only serving to stoke her anger further. "You were just gonna give up 'cause you were scared to come back!"

"I knew what I wanted! Why would you ever—"

He grabbed her arm almost hard enough to hurt. "I _love _you, you dumbass, that's why!"

Naoto's mind stopped dead.

"I—you—" she began, then gave up, because there wasn't a single retort she had to counter that. Instinctively she shot s harp glare at Rise, who instantly snapped back to life and forced a smile.

"We're - we're gonna leave you both to it, okay?" she said. "Let us know if you, um..." The rest trailed off into nothing as she moved away, motioning Chie and Yukiko to follow.

Kanji, meanwhile, threw up a hand and practically attacked his hair with it. His cheeks were flushed crimson and he looked vaguely horrified with himself. "Dammit...you're really, _really _stupid sometimes, you know that?"

Until now, Naoto had been certain that whatever had happened between them last year had ended with her actions in December. Kanji had treated her well since her return, but she'd presumed that was out of pity. Nobody with any sense would continue to care for a person who—

She sighed. _Nobody with any sense. _The category had never included Kanji. "You - even after..."

"Yeah," he whispered. "Always." His fingers brushed unsteadily against her cheek. "And I-I don't even care if you don't feel the same because I woulda made you come back anyway."

Naoto glanced away. "Why? Why would you still—"

"Cause you've got good inside you. It got all screwed up, but it's _there_. You just proved that." He nodded to his left, where Souji now sat upright, rubbing his head. He was surrounded by the rest of the team, all chattering over each other. "And they all know it. That's why they cared if you made it back."

"But I - I didn't—" _I didn't fix anything, because I didn't die._

It was beginning to sound less and less rational.

Naoto sighed. "I thought—"

"You think too much," Kanji told her firmly.

Then he sighed in turn and pulled her up into his lap – and, forehead pressed against hers, trailed his fingers through her hair. His voice was no more than a whisper. "I just wanted you back, y'know?"

Deep down, Naoto knew he wasn't just talking about today.

She swallowed hard. "I know."

* * *

Souji looked exhausted - but with Yosuke's help he was standing and there was a spark in his eyes Kanji couldn't recall seeing in months. They team were all crowded round him now, even Naoto, who Kanji was basically holding upright because she was too damn stubborn to let him carry her.

"This is gonna sound crazy," Chie said, "but Souji, you look a _lot _better."

Yosuke rolled his eyes. "Chie, he looks half-dead." Then he turned to Souji, one arm draped around his shoulder, and grinned. "But, yeah. I agree."

Souji chuckled softly. "Honestly, I feel like I've been run over by a truck. But at the same time, better. More alive." He looked at Naoto. "The same for you, right?"

Naoto nodded. Her fist was gripping the back of Kanji's jacket so hard he swore she'd tear it, but she was smiling slightly too.

"See? It all worked out, for both Sensei and Nao-chan," Teddie said. "And look! We cleared the fog!"

Kanji had actually had time to look around now. It was amazing; more beautiful than anywhere in Inaba. Sunlight everywhere, bright green grass and brooks trickling over rocks and stones and past multicoloured wildflowers. Maybe the TV world was always supposed to look like this? "Was this here before, Ted?"

Teddie shrugged. "I don't remember it. I guess so. A bear's memory isn't always that good, Kanji-chan."

"Can't believe you'd forget a place like this," Yosuke said, shaking his head.

Yukiko looked around, taking in the full vista. "We could come back here later," she suggested. "Make a day of it. Um, not right now, though."

"Yeah…I think Naoto and I are about to keel over," said Souji. "But we'll meet up in a day or two. Celebrate." His smile was tired, ragged yet relieved. "Were you able to hear Izanami's last words?"

Chie nodded, then frowned. "I could, at least. She had some _really _messed up ideas about what humans wanted."

"Humans are hard to figure out sometimes," Ted said. "But she got it even more wrong than _I _do."

"I don't know what she really wanted. I doubt we could even understand. But I hope she'll leave this world alone, for now." Souji looked at each of them in turn. "Thanks guys. I mean it."

There was a chorus of assent - _no problem, it was fine _- but Souji shook his head and grimaced.

"No, it isn't. I let her take control. I—" He quickly glanced at Naoto, then looked back at the others. "Sorry doesn't cut it - but I am."

"It's fine, man," Kanji told him. Because what else was there to say?

This time, Yosuke's grin looked a little forced. "Yeah. It's over now. Why think about it?"

Souji didn't look certain – but nodded all the same. "Let's head back. Teddie, can you find the way out?"

"Of course, Sensei!"

Ted led them across the grass, past a crystal-clear stream and over a slight hill. On the other side, they finally saw the televisions, still stacked in a pile in the middle of the grass. Yosuke was still hauling Souji along, and Kanji Naoto. Glancing sideways, Kanji saw Souji whisper something to Yosuke – and the two of them moved toward Naoto.

"I need to talk to you later," Senpai told her quietly.

"Of course," she murmured.

At first, Kanji pretended not to hear, and he'd have been lying if he said he wasn't jealous - but the way Naoto immediately looked up at him and squeezed his hand helped ease it away.

* * *

It was close to midnight when they spilled back out into an empty electronics department, a fact that immediately set Rise panicking about what her grandmother would say. She spent the walk back to the shopping district with Naoto and Kanji devising increasingly implausible excuses.

"I'll say that the elevator got stuck and I was trapped inside." She paused. "Or maybe that I got locked in a changing room and all the staff went home. Or that I—"

Kanji groaned. "Just tell her you were out with friends!"

"This is my _grandmother_, Kanji-kun. She's the sweetest, nicest old lady, unless you're me and you come home late." Rise shuddered. "Listen, I'm gonna run the rest of the way. Better not make it any worse." She smiled. "I'll come see you both tomorrow, okay?" With that she was gone, running away through the district.

"It's only a few streets further to her grandmother's shop," Naoto pointed out.

"Yeah. But it's Rise." Kanji glanced down at her. "And she's gone, so let me carry you."

Absolutely _not_. "I'm fine," she insisted, fighting off a third wave of dizziness.

He let out a quiet sigh. "Liar," he said - then pulled her off her feet and into his arms.

Naoto immediately kicked out. "K-Kanji-kun! Put me down this instant!"

"C'mon, I've been dragging you all this way! This is easier on us both, yeah?"

It was true, she supposed - but there was no reason to carry her, it was embarrassing and ridiculous and made her feel like a child and—

She sighed. Pride again. It took every ounce of effort, but she managed a quiet, mumbled _thank you _as she wrapped one arm round his shoulders.

"No problem," Kanji said as he pulled her closer.

"I just need some rest," she protested, then glanced down at her bloodstained shirt and winced. "And a change of clothing."

"S'fine. Ma'll be asleep. You'll be better tomorrow. Fit to talk to Souji."

Something in the way he said it - quiet, monotone, thoroughly un-Kanji - plucked at the edge of Naoto's nerves. "Kanji-kun…is something wrong?"

"No. Not really." He grunted. "Just - I dunno. If you wanna move out the store, hang out with him - there's a spare room at his uncle's house, and—"

Naoto raised an eyebrow. "With _Souji-senpai?_"

She swore she felt Kanji shake against her. "Yeah. You and him. You were all buddying up."

_Oh._

This prospect wasn't one Naoto had previously considered, largely because she'd been unconvinced Kanji still held her in any regard. In retrospect, that had been foolish too.

She sighed. She'd been blind for far too long. "It - it isn't what you think. I promise."

"E-Even if it is, I don't mind. S'okay."

She gripped his shoulder more firmly. "Listen. Both Souji-senpai and I suspected something was about to happen, especially as our dreams worsened. We were keen not to involve the rest of you." She winced again. "Of course, things turned out rather differently."

Kanji grunted. "Then you're both idiots. We're a team, all of us. You included."

"Perhaps. But that was the extent of the matter. No more than that."

He looked back at her, eyes clearly nervous. Her hand moved to his jaw almost on instinct and brushed against the skin.

"...You sure?" he mumbled.

She stroked her thumb over his lips. "Positive."

For a long moment, he stared at her - then gave a weak smile. "Cool. Sorry. Really dumb to get jealous, I know."

"Yes," Naoto said simply, and pressed a quick kiss against his cheek.

* * *

By the next day, the fog was gone. It was all over the news and every time Kanji leant on the sill and looked out his bedroom window there were at least two camera crews in the street below.

"Idiots," he muttered. "Gonna be harping on this for weeks. Better warn Souji-senpai to dodge them when he comes over."

Sitting on his bed, Naoto just nodded. Sure, she was still tired, but she seemed distracted with it, even when he walked over and sat next to her. Not like she'd been before, just like she was thinking.

He nudged her in the side. "S'up?"

Her hand moved to the back of her neck and started smoothing down her hair. "I was thinking. I ought to..." Then she sighed. "I ought to return to my apartment soon. I will start to become a burden here."

Kanji instantly jolted forward. "Wh-What? You ain't bothering me!" He started twisting up the fabric of his shirt without thinking. "Having you here's awesome."

She rolled her eyes. "Not a burden to _you_, Kanji-kun. I simply do not wish to impose on your mother's hospitality."

Oh. Right. Naoto was _proper _about that stuff.

Kanji couldn't imagine Ma getting tired of Naoto. Well, okay, he couldn't imagine _anyone_ getting tired of Naoto, which probably said more about him than Naoto herself - but dammit, he knew his own mother. "You kidding? She loves having you here! Always rattling on about how nice it is to have someone so _well-mannered _around." He sighed. "Usually when she's ragging on me."

Naoto reached a hand over and started absently untangling his shirt. "Well, you do provoke her."

"'Cause she's always teasing me. But - if you want t'leave, I'm not gonna—"

She grabbed his arm and gave him the kind of stare that made him feel ten centimeters tall. Must've been taking lessons from Rise. "No," she told him. "Of course I don't."

"Good." He couldn't help grinning. "You, uh, talked to your grandpa about it? Stayin' longer?"

She nodded. "Not yet. I still feel I should leave. But he was - surprisingly supportive of my coming here to begin with."

"He, uh, kinda suggested it. Sort of."

Naoto turned a vague shade of red. "...Oh."

"Yeah. I think he guessed that—"

"Yes, well, he _is _a detective," Naoto said quickly. "Let's change the subject. I would rather not envision my grampa knowing about my—" She made a small, unhappy noise and started rubbing the back of her neck again.

Kanji sighed. "S'okay. Ma figured it out in about two seconds. One of the conditions for you staying is that I'm nowhere near your room after ten at night." He winced. "'Specially after last time."

"She found out about that too?"

"It's Ma. She knows _everything_."

Naoto paused. "Not quite. I wonder if she would be so accepting of me if she knew the truth, everything that transpired last year." Her gaze dropped to the floor. "Quite understandably, Detective Dojima wants as little contact with me as possible."

"Can't blame him for that, man. But the others are coming round." He nodded. "Just 'cause things can't be the same as before doesn't mean they can't be good. You just have to make more of an effort, right? Don't brush 'em off."

When Naoto looked back up, she was smiling. It was slight, tentative, but the most genuine Kanji remembered in a long time. "Perhaps. You're quite insightful."

"Yeah," he said, then winked. "Makes up for being dumb."

Naoto just sighed and punched him lightly in the shoulder.

* * *

Like Kanji had expected, the media went crazy for a while - pulled all those quack scientists and pundits back on their shows so they could pretend they'd known this was all coming - but that died away after a week or two. Some of the people in town took a while longer to get back on their feet, especially the guys who'd really been hurting, the ones cowering in the streets, but pretty soon it was like the fog had never happened.

He said this to Souji, one day, who just smiled. "People can forget anything," he said.

Smart guy.

...fine, so Kanji was still kind of jealous. Nothing he could do about that. Souji was fifty times the man he'd ever be. But even so, maybe he was still good enough - and he was just as cut up as the others when Senpai left town a month later. Souji said he needed to think some things over, see his folks, all that stuff. Told them he'd be back in September. Rise pouted for a good half-hour straight when she first heard and Yosuke even longer, but they all went to see him off at the station. So did a bunch of other people: two jocks from the sports clubs, Ayane Matsunaga from Kanji's class, a chick he'd seen hanging round the drama room, and more still.

"I never realized Souji was so popular," Naoto muttered, sounding a little disgruntled.

Kanji elbowed her in the side. "Y'wouldn't like it if you were. Remember all those letters in your locker?"

She winced and went quiet.

Credit to her, she didn't hide at the back of the group when Dojima brought Souji and Nanako to the station. Just stood and watched quietly as Nanako clung to Souji's neck and begged him not to go, even though he'd be back in just a few months.

"You gonna do that too, Yosuke?" Chie whispered with a smirk.

Yosuke just grimaced and muttered something Kanji was pretty certain you shouldn't say anywhere near a kid.

Dojima was the one to coax Nanako off, in the end, and he shook Souji's hand. If he'd noticed Naoto standing nearby, he did a damn good job of pretending he hadn't.

After a few quick goodbyes to his other friends, the team made their way to the platform as one tight group – and beside the train, Rise pulled Souji into a hug. "You'll come back, right, Senpai?"

"And in September, like you said?" Yukiko added.

"Of course he will. Right, partner?" Yosuke forced a smile. "You can't leave me here alone with Ted and Chie. I'll go crazy before I even graduate."

Chie kicked him lightly in the shin. "Whatever, Hanamura." Then she turned to Souji. "But he's right, you've gotta come back. Don't forget about us, okay?"

Souji laughed. "Couldn't if I tried. You've all been amazing. This past year..." He trailed off, then grinned. "Well, I'm not into emotional goodbyes. But thanks, all of you. Even with everything that happened, I don't think I've ever been as…_complete _as I was here."

"Then don't leave!" Teddie looked like he was about to burst into tears, even after Yukiko wrapped her arm round his narrow shoulders.

"It won't be long, Ted. I promise. Just behave yourself." Then Souji turned to Kanji and winked. "You too, Kanji. No beating up biker gangs."

Kanji grinned back. "Eh, that got old."

"I will keep a watchful eye on him," Naoto said quietly, with a small smile of her own.

"Good. Take care of yourself too, Naoto. That goes for all of you." Then the whistle sounded. "Okay, time to go. See you in September." He gave them one final, warm smile. "Let's hope the next visit is quieter, right?"

* * *

They filtered home in small groups after Souji's departure. Naoto still wasn't certain what to think. The summer, she suspected, would be odd for them all without his presence; particularly for the others, who'd known him far longer and far better.

She would make an effort to know him too, after his return. They'd spoken only briefly the day after his return, but they'd reached some sort of primitive understanding; that they'd shared experiences the others couldn't comprehend, and owed each other their lives. Souji had saved her when she'd first betrayed the team, by refusing to leave her to die. In turn, she had given her life for his. He'd even apologized for what had happened, over and over, as if Naoto didn't owe him more apologies than she could ever deliver.

He was superior to her in so many ways, but learning to accept that was crucial - and perhaps, Naoto thought, glancing up at Kanji as they walked back to the store, she was more than just the sum of her abilities.

She'd had time enough to think about her actions; four months, now. Even if she couldn't truly fix her mistakes, and that knowledge hurt, running away - martyring herself for no reason other than her own cowardice - would have been unjust to everyone she had harmed. Even to herself, and especially to Kanji.

Quietly, she slipped her hand in his and traced her fingers across his palm.

"You were right," she told him softly. "I was a coward before. Living with my actions is harder." She nodded. "But I will do it."

Kanji glanced down at her and smiled. "Not just you," he said, free hand tipping up the brim of her cap. "Us, right?"

Naoto gripped his hand tighter - then smiled back, and hoped.


End file.
